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Fuck the deliveroo scooters, this is delivery with style

I spent a rip-roaring weekend putting new gates up at one of the drives. One thing I've learned since owning our house here is that windows, doors and gates very rarely conform to a standard size! The gate opening is 3.05m, the new gates are 3.00m, which was all good until you add the hinges! So, I had to recess the hinges into the concrete pillars, which took a bit of persuasion with an angle grinder and hammer and chisel! Not perfect, but good enough!

I'll have to post the pics one at a time I think.....oh dear

Of no interest to you lot, but will post them anyway to prove I left the bungalow today. But no bikes there.

Spent most of yesterday at the Henham steam rally. Never seen this first Suzuki before.

I'm working tomorrow, then I'm on holiday till the 19th. Once I get back I then have 6 days to work before I leave definitively.

One last one....

Saw this in my odd places book (like the one Bob bought, but for the civilised counties) but didn't tell my mate where were going, just that it wasn't too far. He lacks my love for old trees or church yards. Supposedly the oldest Yew tree in England, I have seen estimate of 4,000 years, but also only 1500 years. I climbed inside, the odd looking pictures are of me looking upward. I went inside the church, it was stunningly beautiful inside, painted walls. There was a picture of the Queen and a book of remembrance for her so I filled that out. My mate sat outside, he fears the inside of holy places. The weird well with the conical thatched roof is near where I live, I keep meaning to stop and take a picture every time I go past. Today I tried but discovered there is a deep nettle filled ditch on the road side and a big hedge stopping me getting any closer or looking down it. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crowhurst,_East_Sussex

Went to Wales on the weekend, camped , drunk lots of beer, did some ace trail-riding . No sheep were bothered either ...........

Had a line up, everyone likes a line up

Earliest one I could find.

Rode a pretty sandy road today, on my was to lunch, soft sand but not deep at all with a hard compacted ground below so quite easy.

Here's one where he went to Sawbridgeworth fishing. carrying all his gear on his scooter, circa 1955, he#d also have had my father on the passenger seat (he's taking the photo)

More of a scabby orange.

When it all goes well for me, I am usually just congratulating myself when I accidentally kick the oil tray and send a big splosh out of it all over the floor. I remember once refitting my GPz back wheel and it went so so well. No spacers fell out into a gritty area every time I tried to position the wheel, the brake caliper went on first time, the axle slid through with a mere push of the hand and the axle nut spun on and was tightened. That's when I looked down and saw the chain still hanging down on the floor. None of the above smoothness happened when I started again of course, spacers hit the deck, the brake pads fought the disc etc.

Was a warm ride, cool in the airport.....er hospital. also went to Asda for a bun. Not much of a ride, could have kept riding, but doubt the buns would have survived a long ride.

Let's try two....

Good to meet up with you Bob I really like the Duke looks even better in the flesh i need to educate the wife on taking photos though lol

I met these fine peeps for breakfast today. It was bit of a failed mission as the first two places we went were closed. Ended up in a Subway in Stonehouse services, cheers for the breakfast @Sir Fallsalot

We’re here. despite the clouds it’s fucking boiling I’m two pints in and it’s gone straight to my head

Went in the car and did the shopping, don't think anyone recognised us both..

So, today was a special day! I have been wanting to try off road ridding on a motorcycle, something I never did before, and it so happens a customer's mate is a professional motorcross racer and of I went to have a go with this loony that took me through rocks, mud, rivers, Sea cliffs, rickety bridges, forests and even someone's vegetable patch!! In my head we were going on a gentle ride through the countryside, but no, he decided my confort zone needed to be expanded by a considerable shunk!! We climbed and descended things I never imagined I could possibly manage, but somehow I did and the only time I almost didn't, I remembered Elisabeth R "Keep calm and never give up". I'm 3 month short of 50, going through menopause ( I hope it's that, or else my brain is deffo gone with the fairies!!), after a few years of emotional turmoil and copious amounts of anxiety, I really thought I could not hacket anymore, but today I realised I can and actually what is needed is to go, push harder, go further, face the fear, accept the falls and rejoice with the rising from them, believe we can, because we will achieve more then we thought possible!! I'm pretty shuffed with myself today and here are the pictures to prove it!! But because I'm not one for just showing off, there is also evidence of one of 3 falls, this an hilarious one, specially for the Green Laning pros amongst you!! Laugh away, it's funny! Thank you to Michi Kunz , crazy good at what he does and a very kind soul. Interesting project, worth checking out: https://sharebus.ch/

I was out early......nice and cool then! Early 20's! The bad heat has gone but it'll probably still get up to 30 today so I needed an early start. This bike is incredible......I did about 100 miles today and I still haven't put petrol in for ages. I've got no idea how Honda have managed to get consumption so low! Also it's so much easier on these remote roads than the 650GS and the Strom......it even feels lighter than the 650GS despite being a couple of kilos heavier. As for the 1200GS it never even made it as far as the really remote stuff......I'd have probably been well and truly fucked if I'd tried. First off here's a vid of places that look well and truly fucked! I was probably in Murcia province for most of these......can't be sure because they never have signposts out here. Getting more remote now..... No shortage of abandoned shit in these places...... Even a very small church in the middle of nowhere. No human life for about 10 miles so there can't be much in the Collection Box on Sunday! Great open views out there....... Then follow the road and eventually you'll find more debris and destruction! And I even found a bit of grass! Very strange! So there it is.......Real Motorcycling! On a Real Motorcycle!

Starting a ride report weeks in advance the actual thing takes place is not my style at all, I hate all the hype. However, this is more of a declaration of intentions so that I have no excuse to cower out at the last moment quoting some excuse. I have been making tiny preparations over the last few months, just to get myself in the mood. Stuff like renewing my passport, buying a phone that can manage using Moroccan data while keeping my Portuguese number active for (pretending to) work, buying a fender extender to protect the rear shock from rocks, buying a half tinted visor because the dark one is deadly at night and days get shorter in October, buying tires two months in advance, etc ... all that seems like over preparation but in fact was just me trying feel a little more in control by solving stuff when in fact I'm honestly plain scared about what I'm going to face riding out of that boat in Tangier. I've gone to the ridicule of freezing a couple of things at home, so that I have something nice and warm ready for when I return in the dark. My plan is to visit some familiar places and mix that with a bit of adventure, maybe see new places maybe a little more off the beaten path. Mountain passes are what I look forward the most regarding motorcycling, more so when they're heading to the wide open desert heat and herds of camels, in this case it's the easy familiar places that really amp up my anxiety, places where I proposed marriage and was happy, and where my heart broke and I contemplated darkness. Not sure if it's the happy places or the sad one that will challenge me. I'll be doing it alone at my own pace because that's how I deal with stuff, and because in a weird way I can't help but scratch wounds, you know it'll hurt but can't stop yourself from doing it. Today I booked a ferry ticket for the 29th September, a few things were starting to make me doubt going and finding an easy reasonable excuse for staying home working instead, so I bought the ticket and posted this so I'll be too embarrassed to not go at the last moment All that's left now is give the bike a small service, like an oil change and air filter change, and put the new tires on, and hopefully I'll be good to go. I say hopefully because I'm not really up for fixing anything on it, it's never needed anything so here's to that! My mum's 70th birthday is on the 27th, so on the 28th I'll ride to my place, pack everything nice and tidy and get in the mindset, have a nice sleep and on the 29th set off to catch a ferry that's leaving at an unreasonable 15:00 from Tarifa, since it's an adventure I'll probably miss that boat and call an hour earlier to change the ticket to one at 19:00 All in all, it'll be a grand time filled with extreme emotions, a perfectly reliable bike, twisty mountain passes shared with overloaded trucks, smells of spices wafting through street markets, and dusty boots.

I’ve got my thermals on @Pedro , I can always take them off if it gets too warm during the day. note the @Tym type photo

Camped by a river today. The area had a fire roll through about 7 years ago and the old burnt trees still stand.

When i was about 14 they were constructing the A470 past my old mans house to Merthyr i was always out looking for things to pinch. One day I'm walking along the dirt road they created for their plant to travel along when a big four wheel drive tractor came bouncing towards me it was flat out and all over the place and skidded to a stop along side me followed by a massive cloud of dust, i thought i was in for a bollocking for being there but when all the dust settled it was just my mate he pinched it a few miles up the road and like you i had to have a go

Fifteen years time? I’ll still be waiting for the Kawasaki tank and still trying to get the DR running. Thanks, I’m fucking depressed now.

I love a bit of hype, all helps to build anticipation and I like reading the prep people do. Look forward to reading and seeing it all. Sounds like it might be bitter sweet. I dunno if you are really scratching wounds or just doing something that feels like it needs to be done? I met a guy at Burgh Island once who went every year on his own. It was the hotel he and his wife went to and when she died he continued to go. He looked very sad so I asked him why he returned to a place that made him unhappy, he said he felt like he was connected to her there and even though it made him sad it was lovely to feel like she was there. I hope you get some of that too

I've got to admit that I'm not very keen on roads like this! They're narrow and demand 100% concentration in case any dumb Dagos come flying around the bend directly in your path. Apart from that it's continual gear shifts in the lower gears and that gets hard work......especially when it's pretty warm out there. But we needed a ride report so I thought I'd better do something other than debris and destruction! A real man's motorcycle for sure! The recovery truck business in the town is now on a 3 day week since I outed the Beemer! This is a rural hotel complex...... Back on the move again..... I'm very impressed with this thing! Fuck knows when I put petrol in it last! Back out on the open roads to cool down a bit...... Not sure when I'm going to be out next.....because the long term weather forecast shows rain indefinitely! Along with a sudden drop in temperatures! I can't fucking win can I? Anyway......there's a ride report so you losers can live vicariously through my daring exploits! Maybe some of you lot should try doing one sometime!

Had a little run on the 650 to see my parents tonight both have had Covid this month, the old man is still testing positive after two weeks so just had a chat in the garden then took the scenic route home One of the old slag heaps Pete recons i Photoshop green LOL, This is where riding the dirt all started for me a mile from my parents house it was my playground before i had bikes as well, looking towards Cardiff Merthyr Valley on the left Cynon Valley on the right Same spot looking towards the Cynon Valley with the sun going down The old parish road is in need of some maintenance The hill above my front mudguard is where the photos above were taken the slag heap one looking towards where i'm taking this photo from And back on my mountain usual photo looking towards my home

Probably their last name

I’m camped just outside a medium sized city which is strange but fun. Getting lots done, vehicle maintenance, buying some supplies and just staying in one place for a few days. Going for a long hike tomorrow and maybe a swim! Have a lovely weekend everyone.

I have been uploading a lot of YouTube Shorts lately, just wanted to share this one in particular.

Another well kept site for me to cut my way into surprisingly this one worked perfectly

Well just arrived in st John.... Mostly highways today... Got help up by two sport bike doing the speed limit.. Not sure what they were... Yamasuki or a hondasukini.. Anyway those japan crap all look alike to me... I never seen anything gayer in my life... They had plastic Mohawk glued to the top of their bean head... I gave them the bird when I pass those two idiots... I'm roughing it like usual.

Now most of the lanes so far had been climbs or descents over chalk or rock and they were bone dry so the next lane came as a bit of a shock. It started well with a lovely old sign just off the main road............ Then I had to hunt a bit to find the entrance as it went across someone's drive right outside of their posh house Once I got into the lane I first noticed that there was a lot of vegetation and it was very green , this ,meant that there had to be a water course underneath and that usually means boggy going. The vegetation was thick and you couldn't see the ruts underneath so there was a lot of paddling of legs to keep everything upright............... After about 15 minutes to do about half a mile I came to more solid ground (thank god) and stopped for a coffee. While I was stopped I noticed this very ambiguous sign which just about sums up how rights of way in England . It says 'Public route to Public path ' WTF is that supposed to mean ?? The next lane is a bit contentious but the gate wasn't locked today so I carried on up Everley Down. Then I cam to a new lane (to me) and found that someone doesn't want us to ride it I just rode over the pile of chalk/rubble and carried on............ Now I had to do a bit of roadwork to get down to an area of Dorset that reminds me of parts of France. It's heath type land with lots of sand and fir trees...............

Get em a couple of dirty strippers

Tomato season is on its way

One of my favourite tools. It’s a bolt gauge so you can measure size, pitch and length. You can then order bolts/screws without paying crazy Honda/Suzuki/Yamaha prices

The wife said last night I quote “If we go to the rally we are not hanging about in the morning I want to leave by 9” well the pair of us woke at 8:44 so the 9am start was out the window before we got up. first off was fuel and a trip to the cash point but found the cash point out of service no problem I’ll get some cash on route. The ride started off good, nice temperature no wind and I remembered the ear plugs the bike is running smooth as, as something that’s very smooth it’s a great bike two up, when I hit the M4 i get a problem with my lid. my helmet is a flip up with a peak. when we got up to speed the peak was hanging down in my field of view so I stop to sort it out but ended up breaking it instead as it would now either go vertical and almost break my neck each time it did it or it would flip down over the visor totally blocking my view so ended up stopping again and gaffer tapping the peak to the visor and had to ride open faced the rest of the way which was no problem. The M4 was chaotic so turned onto the M48 to cross the old 7 bridge the road was totally empty and we were cruising until we got back on the M4 but only for a few more miles of chaos before we turned off onto a very picturesque A road where I stopped in a petrol station to pay £1.99 to get my own cash out which I hate but needs must. The rest of the ride was uneventful a nice cruise. The campsite is in an airport I’ve been here before but forgot it’s not just light aircraft here so was surprised to see the big planes as well. Tent erection was quick and left me hot and sweaty sounds familiar so from there it was a quick look about and onto the beer tent and pleased to say there’s a nice pint at a reasonable price being served that’s it for now here’s some photo’s these pass as currency here there you have it Pete I’m setting new standards here this is the first ride report from a portaloo in an airport field

I have nothing between my legs!....you seem you have bugger all between your ears.

Not sure what one yet…

Okay, as a newbie here I'm submitting my new bike. At just three weeks old, I present my Yamaha XSR700.