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This is Puskas, after 2 years of living in a shelter in Northern Portugal, sleeping with shelter from the rain but not from the cold he has now found out about central heating and soft beds and pillows and toys. He’s enjoying the warmth while outside the cold storms are hitting strong.

Four men went golfing one day. Three of them headed to the first tee and the fourth went into the clubhouse to take care of the bill. The three men started talking and bragging about their sons. The first man told the others, "My son is a home builder, and he is so successful that he built a friend a new home for free. Just gave it to him!" The second man said, "My son is a car salesman, and now he owns a multi-line dealership. He's so successful that he gave one of his friends a new Mercedes, fully "loaded." The third man said "My son is a stockbroker, and he's doing so incredibly well that he gave his friend an entire portfolio" The fourth man joined them on the tee after a few minutes of taking care of business. The first man mentioned, "We were just talking about our sons. How is yours doing?" The fourth man replied, "Well, my son is gay and is a go-go dancer in a gay bar." The other three men grew silent as he continued, "I'm not totally thrilled about the dancing job, but he must be doing well. His last three boyfriends gave him a house, a brand new Mercedes, and a stock portfolio."

"I saw a job advertised as a fanny waxers assistant. Job includes removing ladies knickers, prepare fanny for waxing and rub oil in after waxing. When i asked at the job centre they said i had to go to Cornwall. I said why, is that where the job is? No they said thats where the back of the fucking queue is!!"

Finally got the chance to sync the carbs. Bike is ticking over beautifully. Throttle response is spot on and sounding very smooth. Short of getting a colour tune and playing with the air screws not sure there is much else to be done. As to the chinky gauges I am amazed at how good they are for £19.99. Not suggesting they are the best but the appear to be working very well.

A young ventriloquist was touring Sweden and, one night, he was doing a show in a small fishing town. With his dummy on his knee, he started going through some of his standard dumb blonde jokes. Suddenly, a blonde woman in the fourth row stood on her chair and started shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype Swedish blonde women that way? What does the colour of a woman's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's men like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community, and from reaching our full potential as people. It's people like you who make others think that all blondes are dumb! You and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general; pathetically, all in the name of humour!" The stunned ventriloquist started to apologize, but the blonde interrupted and screamed: " You stay out of this! I'm talking to that little shit sitting on your lap."

Going stir crazy today as I haven’t been out on 2 wheels for 10 days or more. Had to run a couple of errands so took Shadows bike for a run, she’s hasn’t been on it for maybe 2 months. She has had health issues and it’s hit her confidence a bit. Anyway not dwelling on that, it was good to go out on a bike even if it was a 125. Throughly pleasant little thing as long as you’re not in a hurry. It handles well with plenty of grip even in the wet, Not sure I could cope with life at mostly 50 mph. Just feel to vulnerable with next to nothing in reserve. Better than not riding though.

Here we go then folks , it's the one you've been waiting for .......... Let's see your submissions for the first month of the new year. Photos must be in Landscape (not portrait) and be a photo of a bike YOU own and have been taken in January 2026. @Vamana Gupta ......... Landscape = lying down flat, Portrait = standing up

The Oxford Heated grips on my CBF were worn smooth and the controller was on its last legs so I treated it to a new set of the same. Also while I had it stripped down I fitted an upgraded Scott Oiler that I was generously given a few weeks ago. I will put the simpler Scott oiler on my Hornet. I bought the commuter versions of the Oxford grips as they are significantly cheaper and don’t have the smart controller. They only have 2 settings but I never used the 5 levels of heat on the standard version of the heated grips. Plus they have an on off switch rather than a load of buttons. I also took the CarPlay GPS off the bike as I just wasn’t using it. To much clutter on the bars.

It would not bother me one little bit if he was in my car for the journey. Being as deaf as a post I would not hear him.

Still hanging around, managed to get out in the garage for a couple of hours today

He'd probably try to cure you from your defnest...by giving you one of those Haleluya slap across the forehead...lol.

good tune on the radio

Fucking hell, you step away for a bit …

Ok, due to the pathetic amount of entries I'm not going to bother with a vote. @XTreme must be turning in his grave .......... As I'm not inclined to vote for myself I declare @Vamana Gupta's Qwad the winner PS. You're all a bunch of gay pansy wannabes

Well time to go pick up a van to move house, it was only a 6 month let with the option to extend if we wished but the house is not fit for purpose and the landlord is a proper bellend so we're not giving him anymore or our money, the new place is a 4 bed town house so getting more room and the kitchen is bigger so the wife is happy

I had to buy a new battery today for my bike..Cost an arm and a leg...Honda C70 1977 A full on 6volter:::good old motobat not a lot of spare cash left now. £17.29p

Just got to do a valve check then the Sprint will be confidently on the road.

Best take it in to John deere then for its service

Light weight, mine hasn't moved since Oct..

"too".

I just use wooden clothes pegs on each pipe trick given me by an old guy many years ago when we used manometers to check air in the telephone cables. That was when i was a Lad.

He looks like he has made himself at home, good on you for giving the little guy a second chance at a good life.

What a stunning pup, he looks a lot like my dog only younger . Congratulations on you new buddy

Man after my own heart... I love my K25 pick-up.... it may be 35 y/o but it's sooo dang reliable & easy to work on .... Our '16 Equinox has turned out to be a great ride as well....

If I could afford a much newer one I would have another, it has been a good car for 10 years, but the mechanicals, and other things are wearing out, at the same time. I have my eye on a Chevy.

Good luck @Clive Top tip, don't buy another Dacia

Hope you get it sorted mate

Sounds flooded, floor the throttle and keep it turning. Sometimes when the plugs get wet it travels through to the lambda prob. I've had to take it and the plugs out to dry off.

Can't remember the last time I rode mine, i know it was last year.

I had a duff push button on some thing but can not at the Mo remember what it was, i pulled it apart and glued a bit of metal under the button, i had a tiny magnet in the try..a qwik touch and up the button popped..Had to keep the try clean thou or all sorts of crap stuck to it.. This was years ago when i could not afford a shop coffee never mind a garage fix.

I hate vehicle electrics. and now I have 2 problems to contend with. 1.....cars fuel gauge is on the blink, it just registers half full, even with the wires disconnected from the sender....I hate not know what's in the tank. 2... scoots electric seat release button stays in when pushed, and it's a big job to get to it.... but the sun is shing and quite warm with the sun on the shed roof, I even took off my coat.

Puskas looks ace @Pedro, great name as well

No, that was just a photo of a load of wankers. It was YOU that suggested one of them was the next Prime Minister............. set the example Urco

Set the example! No politics…

Still getting out and about on mine Clive……..brrrraaaaaaap That’s my mates SYM 300 GTS behind mine with a rather fetching ELF paint job…….he’s a really good sprayer and has a booth in the corner of his swanky garage.

A Man goes into a Bakers and asks for 2 Bread Rolls..?? The Shop Man picks them up with the Tongs and puts them in a Paper Bag, He then asks for 2 Cakes the Shop Man picks them up with the Tongs and puts them in the Bag. The Man says :- "It’s nice to see you don’t Handle the Food".. The Shop Man says :- "Nothing in my Shop is Handled by Human Hand".. He then noticed a Piece of String hanging out of the Shop Man's Trousers and asks :- "What is that Piece of String for"..??? The Shop Man says :- "When I need a Piss. I just pull on the String and it Pops Out".. "That’s OK" Says the man. "But how do you put it Back"..??? "That’s No Problem", says the Shop Man. "I just Use the TONGS"