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Bugger! I could have took a photo on my epic ride to the hospital today.......I parked in the bike/motorcycle area, next to a R1, when I came out after visiting time he/she had moved the bike along 2 places!.

I have several times, especially when I was younger. As teanagers we all used to hang at Polmear Cafe. One wet day I had to go, in my dads work gear yellow leggings and donkey jacket. I had a Suzuki TS185, I jumped up high to kickstart it in true moto crosser fashion, as we all did for no reason back then, only for my foot to slip off the kickstart and it to shoot up the inside of my nanaman leggings and stop me putting my foot down as I slowing fell over to the right with momentum. Of course all my mates were watching and cheered. Bastards. By the time I got out from under the bike one twat had written 6.0 on two sheets of A4 in Olympic gymnastic style and was holding it up to the window. Of course the piss was takenmfor weeks after

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY BY PAM AYRES The missus bought a Paperback, down Shepton Mallet way, I had a look inside her bag;... T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey". Well I just left her to it, And at ten I went to bed. An hour later she appeared; The sight filled me with dread. In her left hand she held a rope; And in her right a whip! She threw them down upon the floor, And then began to strip. Well fifty years or so ago; I might have had a peek; But Mabel hasn't weathered well; She's eighty four next week!! Watching Mabel bump and grind; Could not have been much grimmer. And things then went from bad to worse; She toppled off her Zimmer! She struggled back upon her feet; A couple minutes later; She put her teeth back in and said "I am a dominator!!" Now if you knew our Mabel, You'd see just why I spluttered, I'd spent two months in traction For the last complaint I'd uttered. She stood there nude and naked Bent forward just a bit I went to hold her, sensual like and stood on her left tit! Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out; My God what had I done! She moaned and groaned then shouted out: "Step on the other one!!" Well readers, I can tell no more; Of what occurred that day. Suffice to say my jet black hair, Turned fifty shades of grey!!

Here’s my effort for February………look it’s even got pretty blossom in the background.

@boboneleg has been spotted with his posse. https://www.facebook.com/reel/3696490163822025/?fs=e&s=TIeQ9V&fs=e&fs=e

What could possibly go wrong?

My one is when I got my kawasaki eliminator me and my dad had just got to the bike dealer and it is sat out front brand new, so after talking to the owner of the shop we said our goodbyes, I got on the bike took it off the sidestand and promptly fell over as I was surprised by the weight, anyway picked it up and dusted myself and the bike down, no damage to either, it was sat back on its sidestand so I thought ok lets try this again... so again I sat on the bike, flipped the sidestand back up and lost balance and over it went on to its other side.... As it happened 3rd time lucky I had it upright and off we went

He's not riding an Indian.

Just been out and got some fuel and fired the Sprint up. Sounds awesome to my ears. Started up reasonably quickly once the fuel got through. Came off choke and I had to adjust the tickover slightly but that was it. Impressed that my low fuel light decided to join the party with fuel in the tank. Everything is working including the fan. No reason not to ride it now. I will start with a few short trips until I am used to it, but I haven’t felt like this about a bike since I had my 1978 R100RS.

Balance is restored

Yeah, but what can I do about it? My bike has PEDALS so I'm automatically DQ'd.....at least it has the correct number of wheels...ffs I'm just that amputee NuklHed that posts pics of machines & places that we'd like to have or pay a visit to.

Thats the issue mate you've taken her to Kingsmill.... she needed a hospital and you've taken her to a bread making factory

Pedro its simply cause 99 % of us aren't riding at the moment..most are still dealing with mid winter conditions...unlike you..who's experiencing spring...the lack of participants isn't cause of you , in fact you did and excellent job, and thanks for taking the time ...

Think I broke Pedro with the qwad...lol.

Looks like a job for @Six30, unfortunately he flounced like a pussy. Better call @Saul

Out on the atv...beautiful sunny days...

Bitumen sprayers are classed as plant. I didn't realise you had packed in proper driving, probably a wise choice given your track record though.

I’m sure it wouldn’t be the first time you had a wet arse.

My shed has been named the ‘Healing Shed’ according to Shadow. Her bike is now resident as I am going to tidy it up again. First job is to get these scratches out that were caused by Storm Goretti a few weeks ago. I was given a random orbital car polisher for my birthday several years ago. I never used it, don’t really care about polishing cars that much, plus my car is pretty good paint wise. Today was the day to try it out to see if I could fix Shadows tank. I was surprised how well it worked with just Autoglym polish. Bit to big and cumbersome for a bike really but it certainly worked well. The results aren’t perfect but pretty presentable. Mucky bleddy thing to use though. I got as much polish on me as I did the bike. Tucked away for the night, I am going to touch in the rust sections on the frame and crash bars tomorrow. Loads of little things to do. And I don’t doubt Shadow will want it back then to smash up again. I don’t mind really.

Just had some foamy therapy cleaning up the CBF and Shadows bike. Also had a close look at what needs to be done cosmetically after Shadows damage and storm Goretti’s damage to it. Not to bad really few bits and bobs to be paired and some paint correction (polishing) on the tank. A few days in the healing shed will get most of it done.

Well that recommendation sounds like the kiss of death

So unlike you to go off on one and fuck everything up for yourself. You stable genius you.

Yes....lol...Pete and Phil were pissed and I was promptly demoded...lol.

I will do it if no one else want to. I would appreciate your help for the first Month @Pedro if no one else steps up.

You need to get hold of Adult Social Services Clive which are part of the local authority (council), plus there are other agencies. PM me your email and I will forward the links to you. You can challenge the discharge if you feel you don't have safe provision for your wife. Sounds hard but you would be doing it for the best reasons. You have to say, no she can't come home until there is a care package in place, you have to say you cannot cope and it is not safe for her or you. You will have to explain to them that the only place she can sleep is the sofa which is not safe or suitable. First two weeks of the package is already funded without assessment. You will probably get it ongoing depending on your benefits and the assessment of Adult Social Services. Age Concern and Citizens Advice will help. It's stressful mate but you will get what is needed if you stick to your guns. Horrible that you have to do so but that is the way of things in England. If you want to discuss more PM me and I will put you in touch with my Mrs who is sorting out something very similar for her Mum.

May I suggest one of these.

She has compression fractures in the middle/lower part of her spine, not helped I expect with her suffering from osteoporosis..... apart from a couple of X Ray's and giving her pain meds, that have very little effect, she has not even had a doctor visit her and tell her whats what......peace & quiet!. I have that all the time But I will make the most of the ride to the hospital later.....

Oh no mate whats happened to her? Don't enjoy the peace and quiet too much, but when you gotta ride, you gotta ride

Perfect weather to go out in a leather jacket and just be out. Went up to the hill cafe for lunch, on the way there a road was partially washed out for a few meters, no issue really but impassable for cars. Then stopped for a coffee and a chat with my friends at the Dainese shop, then got groceries for dinner and now home. Must have been over 20° today, perfect but every field is still flooded and they say it’s going to rain again next week. Didn’t stop for pictures as I was soaking in the weather on the bike.

Stripped and painted. Gotta wait 24 hours for the paint to cure before I can refit the covers. In the mean time I want to check the friction plates in the clutch and fit the new springs.

First proper blue skies I’ve seen since December. Am now enjoying being home with the windows open and Spring beginning to spring, and will take the bike out for lunch today.

Next job for a young lad is the RM80, had a qwik look see...oil pump dead so big end and crank are in need of replacment, as is the piston and bore. So he is going for a big bore kit..so i have to make acrank case jig to split the cases first..I will get some metal in to do that next week. I have a drybolic puller/pusher so that may help..

Just don't try to bann the administration...lol.

Sorry to hear about all that, Clive.

Thankfully she would never get insurance for my car in the UK. She will have to get some sort of 1.0 litre car and then it won't be cheap. I don't blame her, she had a real health scare before Christmas and hasn't got her confidence back yet, hopefully she will. I will be keeping the bike around until October when she will have to reinsure it if she doesn't we will talk about it then.

Ride it like you stole it.

The Sprint is ready to be used, I won’t say finished as it has done 50,000 miles and is 28 years old, there is always going to be something. Only thing left on the list for me though is a wheel refurb and to paint the valve cover but apart from that I don’t know of anything that needs doing. Both of those will be a next winter jobs. Last few new bits for today. I bottled using the black plate so bought a new standard one. Also a new Triumph vacuum line for the fuel tap, I wasn’t happy with the line on it. Also a new knob for the fuel tap as the original one is blobbed up with Araldite or some sort of epoxy. Before refitting the clutch cover I stripped and checked the clutch. All friction plates right at the top of the Triumph spec at 3.8 mm or just above. The plain plates all had no measurable warping. I would hazard a guess that this is not the original clutch. While it was apart I fitted the EBC heavy duty clutch springs. Supposed to be 15% stiffer than standard, couldn’t tell really but the action seems much more positive. Hoping the slip I had was due to the slave cylinder which I have already rebuilt So all back together, just need to get some E5 and take it out for a shake down. Gonna wait for a dry day though and give myself every chance to get used to it before I go on any group rides. I so wanted to give it a major polishing but want to give the engine cases plenty of time to cure before touching them. They will get a satin finish and lose the shine over time, like standard.

Have to wait till the doc comes to see her, and see what he says about treatment, or just discharge (fob off) her......

Sending up Prayers for Mrs. Clive... I have done the same Clive.... ya gotta Ride when you can--

Wales where i live was like that a few years ago, cheaper to pay the parking fine on the road and bloke the traffic into the hospital than pay the parking fine. They never told anybody but pay to veiw TV as well. so nobody had the TV on, people brought in radio's all playing differnt programs at the same time...the nurses went mental..and the doctors doing the rounds in the mornings.. So they stopped the lot...all free now in Wales. PS: get well soon Mrs Clive.

Just back from visiting my wife in the Hospital, it costs £5..50p to park the car for 2 hours, i hope the weather forecast is correct, then I can go on the scoot tomorrow........free parking!.