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Pay no heed @boboneleg you’re getting slated by the narrator of Ivor the Engine.

So why isn’t it great when you are older? What the fuck do they do to you lot in Portugal? At age 11 do your parents sit you down and give you ‘the talk’, “Pedro, you know all that food that you really like? Well you can’t have it anymore, here is a plate of shit and congealed sick, get used to it!” Then you grow up to be an angry fat lad riding a Teutonic wank panzer shouting at people on Internet forums for enjoying life. It’s all becoming so clear now.

Sure stand still…..always happy to help…

As if you could chew that Phil?

@XTreme would like this shit, no DBM's though

I've spent a good half an hour looking inside this one in Evora, it's not as well lit as these pictures below indicate, which makes it gloomier.

You’re really touchy about your burger bread

I never implied it wasn't good. It's great, if you're 10 You're supposed to be a man's man, tall dude, cigars and whisky and a big Harley, and you're eating your burgers with children's bread? Do you stop that lovely big red Harley and chew on gummy bears on breaks, too?

While I was waiting for Costa to have a good sniff and make up his mind about having a poop or not, I took a couple of pictures dedicated to @yen_powell, of my local cemitery on a dewy night. The crossed bones above the gates have always seemed kind of weird to me.

It depends who the muffin belongs too

Well that’s that then. Other than the colonists who didn’t know there were different types of bread we can all look forward to enjoying our tiger bread, except for Pedro who will be chowing down on something a little different. Here you go Pedro, enjoy!

You two are a pair of 'part-timers' , you're not truly Welsh as don't even speak the language. At least I speak true Bristolian What you say @Specs

But I don'r sound like the only gay in the village

Looks a lot like a place that someone may have disposed of bodies in at some point in the past, it isn’t near the border with Wales by any chance is it?

You sound like a fucking village Yokel Bob!

Ok @Slowlycatchymonkey , what parts have you been showing Marcel that has convinced him that you're a woman ?

Im guessing 'polish munter' ?

Not local to me, no, but I’ve been in a couple of those, I think they’re more common in the Alentejo. It takes quite a lot for me to go and look at the inside of a chapel

That's a pretty grave yard, thank you for the pictures. Have you got any local churches with piled up bones, the sort that make a display of them?

I always thought it should be called Chita bread, but I can see how that wouldn't work in English

Do you like tiger bread?

propably not even his tiger bread.... deep fried mars bar and a can of irn bru , yeh thats more believable

plenty of it at morrisons

They said it was hot today, i seemed cool, never trust anybody.

Ask any Welshman and he'll tell you that the bloke playing that part does not do a correct Welsh accent! It may sound right to you lot but to us it sounds fucking weird! Tell him @Sir Fallsalot

In the woods on the left

I think they were built as the bones "became available", but I'll visit next time I'm there and inform myself.

Correct, for Marcel

I don't need any step to fall over.

I have evil relations and I prefer to stay off their radar. They're not all about the peace n love and they're skilled at fucking things up.

Small blue things I suspect.

Yeah , come on @Slowlycatchymonkey . Show us your old wringle nut sack.............

I meant streams of texts at 4am, posessive behaviour, asking if you want kids after 5 minutes, crying when you say hello to the girl at the supermarket cashier, mad, are crazy eyes a good thing in the uk?

I think its great Pedro, its a little vibey on the footrests but pretty smooth at constant throttle and will sit at 55mph on the road, does around 40mpg and can i just fill up at the pump without messing about with oil. Probably do about 150 to 200 miles before the low level light comes on for the two stroke oil but i just refill after every ride. I don't like the maintenance schedule but its a two stroke and to be expected on the plus side its easy to rebuild and i don't like oil pump as its electronic and scares me as it looks so fragile would have prefered a mechanical pump like the old DT's had years ago i carry a small bottle of oil as an emergency measure if the pump did fail, lots of people go back to premix but that defeats the reason i bought the bike being oil injected was the only reason considered buying it

I love white bread cant beat a fresh thick slice toasted and covered in real butter unfortunately for me its no good for diabetics

I always wanted to ride a big Harley, this is going to be great!

Sounds kind of iffy, dude. Be safe. By safe, I mean take protection. By protection, I hope you know what I mean. It's not knee pads, well, not just knee pads....

Looks like i'm out on the bike tomorrow now got a man I've never met picking me up in a van in the morning and taking me up country for some riding

I phoned Heart FM today, to enter their mystery prize competition. The presenter answered and said, "Congratulations on being our first caller, all you need to do is answer the following question correctly, to win our Mystery Grand Star Prize.” "That Fantastic!" I called out in delight. "Feel Confident?" the presenter asked, "It's a Geography Question." "Well, I've got a degree in Geography from University," I proudly replied, "and I've taught Geography to A level students for the last 5 years" "Ok then, to win our grand prize of 2 VIP tickets to a Tory leadership hustings and to meet the two leadership candidates afterwards for afternoon tea, what is the capital of France?" "Bracknell", I replied.

Got to be done......it's the only way to avoid the heat if you're out on the bike! Bear in mind that I live at 3000ft anyway, so I have to go way above that to get a 10C drop in temperatures. Nice when you're up there, but once you start descending again the heat really hits you. I'm not that keen on the roads either! Yes they're twisty and winding but the variable surface and bad tarmac aren't too clever! Plus, the road is narrow and very often you can be in the middle of a bend and find a car on the wrong side of the road coming right at you. On occasions there's a sheer drop of hundreds of feet on the bends as well.....so it's not a road for Casuals! Bike went superbly......so easy to manage, and quite frankly, any more power and weight would be of no use to you in this sort of environment.

I had a free pass today and the weather was looking ok so a chance to get out on the Sled for a decent ride. I wasn't really feeling fit enough to go yomping up hills to look at the reamains of castle's or towers but while perusing a map online last night I noticed a Donkey Sanctuary in Devon. So, off we got at 08.00 am and down through Cheddar Gorge before the hordes decsend........... Arty farty shot of my new lid, and no @Buckster it doesn't signify wanker, the 'W' is for Wobert Down across the levels in glorious sunshine and a quick stop for a coffee by the river Isle near Muchelney Abbey............. Now there was a lot of guessing on todays route as I haven't set up a GPS on the Sled yet so it was more a case of 'follow your nose'. Anyway I found the sanctuary and big bonus it was free to get in............ Donkey's were smoothed and gawped at for the next hour before it got to hot to stay outside in heavy biking gear................ So I went inside to their excellent resturant and had a Caeser salad and possibly the best chocolate milkshake I've ever tasted. I started the journey back home but around the Baltonsborough triangle I realised why I love a good GPS as I managed to spend 45 minutes going around in a big circle. I realised this when I passed the same parked car twice as it had a big 'for sale £2200' sign on it which made me think 'in your fucking dreams' Anyway, normal service was resumed when I found my way back to the A37 and one last coffee stop at one of my favourite trails............... #

I'm not going to take it off-road if I can help it. The front cylinder would be vulnerable even on a gravel road, I know you can get guards but I don't really want to do that at this point. Yes, I would take it on a long trip but it would probably be all tarmac.

Sorry Bob when i read that this came to mind are you sure that's not supposed to Robert