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The power of make up ..

Here ya go, our three kids too.

So, @Clive, this guys goes out drinking with his friends and decided to end the night with a visit to his local "gentleman's club", however he is running very low on funds for such activities. We walks in, and sheepishly asks for a girl. Once talking to the madam, he confesses he only has 15 quid to spare, but still would like to end the night in style. She tells him that for such a small amount all he could get is a "penguin blowjob". He isn't too thrilled by the sound of it, but she tells him he'll enjoy it so in he goes. A moment goes by, and an older lady joins him, not the kind of young beauty he was hoping for but beggars can't be choosers. She leans him against the wall, tells him to relax, drops his pants and gets going. She had experience, and he's really starting to enjoy himself, he starts getting REALLY into it and just as he feels like he's about to reach his climax, the "penguin blowjob" creeps back up on his mind, he has no idea why would such a masterful blowjob be called such an unappealing name. He says: "This is just lovely, you're so great at this, I'm about to cum!!!" Having been warned of his pending explosion, the lady stops and walks away. Still leaning against the wall, with his ankles bound by his pants, he tries to follow her in desperation:

Just saw this up the local shops , great score for me

I bet I won't look like that after our holiday.....more like

Singing has got to be better than Minecraft

Singing is cool mate, group admin is a pain in the ass. I love singing in my group and leading that, just don't enjoying the sorting and arranging. Also don't like surprises, couldn't say no to taking part in the D day celebrations, sneaky vicar.

No, I can't

It's better in person because you do the walk. But there's gifs

Must be something to do with being a cock

The one photo that I may have could be Tintype......

Damn I'll have to go digging now, not going to ask the wife where they are as i'll be inundated with questions LOL

Luckily, I have no photographic evidence of my 2nd marriage.....

Guilty! Oh no, shit, it's a wedding. My bad.

dont worry mate ..ill post some pics next week of some proper El scorchio sun

the first time yeh ..give him that one .. why didn't the soppy twat put the side stand down when lifting it up.

Wrong hoof though Bob

Yes it is an Italian import so the speedo was in Km/H and I just fitted a universal speedo that reads in MPH Should have got a KMH one and put a converter on it

Come on boys and girls, inspired by @Catteeclan's recent activities , get your wedding photos up here so we can all have a laugh. Pete would have loved this shit

At least they will be able to see where they are going?

1990

Found this in the fridge.

1923 by the looks of it, what a gammon!

I may have 1 photo somewhere try and find it out tomorrow.

Just doing it

You first then Bob

You don't possess a tie then Dave ?

Better start building that Ark then

Wife wants a holiday in September, she looked at Guernsey, Jersey and even the Isle of Man, but bloody hell, the prices it makes some place in the Med look cheap.......so we may try Gt. Yarmouth

Busa? https://fb.watch/slEmv5tMNn/?

https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/28159720/britain-wettest-summer-on-record/ Oh Fucking joy!....

Talk about being set up, I heard at the weekend that Lankelly Shout, my singing group, is going to be doing an hour set in the D-Day celebrations in the town. Great, nine days to organise a set list, song sheets and teach the veg the songs they don't know. Just about got the set list together, shared Vids for what they have to learn, now doing the song sheets. Just love admin me . Also heard the Vicar would be grateful if we go and bolster the church service hymn singing before hand. I have just sung 3 days of the last 4 so have no voice to practice myself. Day of moaning and swearing at the puter for me, just wanted to play Minecraft with my youngest. . There better now I have vented better crack on

Bugger

So makeup doesn’t always improve.

it wouldn't work on here if its the same joke i was told..

You forget she likes bikes and has one of her own.

The other night I was invited out for a night with the “girls.” I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, “I promise!” Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily. Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, realising my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed… 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos = MIDNIGHT !) The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him “MIDNIGHT”… he didn’t seem pissed off in the least. Whew, I got away with that one! Then he said “We need a new cuckoo clock.” When I asked him why, he said, “Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said “oh shit” Cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.