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Im surprised you didnt capsize it, were you told you had to stay in the centre of the boat cos you're such a fat cunt

Dude gets tanned from going riding in a tshirt and suddenly he thinks he’s a descendant of Shaka Zulu!

Thankfully @Marcel has used his post allocation for the day.

1 year ago today 18th August 2025 Dell pasted away from cancer. RIP Dell always will be remembered.

At the end of the tax year, the IRS office sent an inspector to audit the books of a local hospital. While the IRS agent was checking the books, he turned to the CFO of the hospital and said, “I notice you buy a lot of bandages. What do you do with the end of the roll when there’s too little left to be of any use?” “Good question ,” noted the CFO. “We save them up and send them back to the bandage company and every once in a while, they send us a free roll.” “Oh,” replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went, in his obnoxious way. “What about all these plaster purchases? What do you do with what’s left over after setting a cast on a patient?” “Ah, yes,” replied the CFO, realizing that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. “We save it and send it back to the manufacturer and every so often they will send us a free bag of plaster.” “I see,” replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all CFO. “Well,” he went on, “What do you do with all the remains from the circumcision surgeries?” “Here, too, we do not waste,” answered the CFO. “What we do is save all the little foreskins and send them to the IRS office, and about once a year they send us a complete prick.”

Always think of those when I see a Top-Box on any bike....

I often think of Pete when riding I learned from him when riding with him, I was a mental thrasher, on and off the throttle whereas Pete was smooth and constant, I did make him laugh though when I blasted past him on my Caponord right into the path of a Pheasant rising up from the tarmac, I had to duck to avoid my head getting taken off Well at least he saw why I have my user name LOL, his smooth flowing riding did inspire me to do better

Replaced them today, I have a tool that uses a drift to remove the originals and a press to fit the new ones. I also have a new shifter shaft to go on but I also pulled the clutch today so will fit the shaft when I reassemble everything. The primary oil smelt nicely burnt from the slipping clutch.

After now having done a longer trip on the bike here's some brief findings... It's got stacks of torque, makes it very easy on single carriageway A roads, towns and twisties, pulls like a train tips into bends like it's reading your mind, it's effortless, on rails, no wobbles and feels like cheating On bigger roads such as dual carriageways I don't like it much at all, high frequency vibes through the pegs and seat (not a huge issue) the throttle grip spring is too strong, makes your hand hurt trying to sustain a constant speed for long periods, it's also far far far too sensitive the tiniest of movement will cause the bike to slow and speed up making it feel like the fuelling is very bad on rougher roads, especially around 65 mph/4,000 rpm, I'm fairly sure it's not fueling as if I concentrate on locking my hand position it goes away It's nice to have aftermarket exhausts for some street cred, but on long journeys the drone is tiring and a nuisance, adding to rider fatigue This is a new one for me, I'm 5'7" (and a half ) and 12 stone dripping wet, so with the adjustable seat set to the middle position I'm finding my legs too cramped and it was causing knee pain, on a good note and can get both feet flat on the ground, I've only every been able to do that on my V-Max, ridiculously I may have to raise the seat for my loft 5'7" (and a half ) height but then the bars are going to be lower than I'd like and it already has bar risers fitted. I can get 58mpg if I ride at a steady 65mph which is good Over all it's a fun bike to ride through the twisties, puts a shit eating grin on your face but commuting or long distance is very disappointingly tiring and strained and I think I would most certainly opt for the car to do that If I can't fix these things I will most likley offload the bike and get something like an NC700/750 or a cruiser (yes I know I take the piss but I do like them really), I found my V-Max very comfy and solid even in the worst of side winds, just it's pathetic tank capacity and thirsty engine makes it impractical for anything but posing and drag racing, oh and putting me in a wheelchair for 2 months lol, I don't need all the power/torque of the CBF, even on my 400 scooter nobody overtook me except for the flat out hooners. The bike is heavy, oddly heavy in that wheeling it around is hazardous, I never had that issue with my Caponord (but that was 23 years ago) but there aint bugger all I can do about it's weight Maybe, a set of original end cans, one of those throttle cruise control things (not really cruise control, just a plastic grip thingy), also changing the cogs might help, 1st and 2nd gear are almost redundant, so perhaps a smaller front and larger rear might make it more relaxed riding PIC for attention

Met my mate Steve today as he was having his Enfield MoTed and I was having Shadows CBF MoTed right after. Chap turned up on this interesting Cafe Racer type thing. Sounded awesome. So both bike with fresh MoT’s we took the Cb125F back up where I picked up my CBF. We headed for Dameralls to see the new Honda CB1000F. Very nice indeed although I would want real clocks. Loads there today

Scoot passed the MOT with flying colours this morning, so it should, only covered 230 miles since the last MOT...... Bloody embarrassing.

Yes that’s right, Scotland shares a border with Iraq.

She's back

So today I pressed apart the clutch basket and replaced the clutch hub bearing and pressed it all back together. Here it is all pressed apart. New bearing pressed in and retaining ring fitted. Inner hub pressed in and retaining ring fitted. Time for lunch then fit the new clutch pack.

A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards . The little boy asked why he wore his collar backwards . The man, who was a priest, said, " I am a Father . ." The little boy replied, "My Daddy doesn't wear his collar like that." The priest looked up from his book and answered, "I am the Father of many . The boy said, "My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn't wear his collar that way!" The priest, getting impatient, said . "I am the Father of hundreds", and went back to reading his book. The little boy sat quietly thinking for a while, then leaned over and said, "Maybe you should wear a condom, and put your pants on backwards instead of your collar."

Couldn't be more fitting!....

Did a bee sting you in the face? You need to get that looked at, preferably by someone with a strong stomach.

I might be moving to the states...I'm heading towards and ice cream shop...

To the east ? Oh by the way... I found ice age animals today...lol.

35 metres.

Tour Pak.

Who?

I have exciting news, my trip to bury was to make a purchase, if I could get the deal I wanted, which I did.

It’s to make kebabs on when I cross into Iraq.

You seem to have fitted a barbecue behind the back seat.

Congratulations @Pedro a great photo.

Look what my Mate Steve bought today. Liked mine so much he went and bought a newer better one today. Barsteward.

That top-box would make Pete proud...

Like matching track suits.

Clutch is fully assembled, I will put it back in the bike in the morning, I had to go out and help a friend with a problem with his electric garage door this afternoon, the friction pads on the Barnet clutch are much wider than the oem. It all went together nicely, quite an easy job really. The press is one I bought on Amazon, it was a return apparently and was been resold for less than £80 so I snapped it up and have not regretted it.

A woman was on the way to winning $100,000 on a game show, but her final question was suspended for the next night. Her husband sneaked into the studio and found the question and answer. He raced home and told his wife "Your question is 'What are the three main parts of the male anatomy', and the answer is 'The head, heart and penis.' The woman thinks about this throughout the night, but keeps forgetting the answer. Her husband keeps reminding her, "The head, heart and penis." Come the game show she has forgotten again, and the presenter asks, "For $100,000, what are the three main parts of the male anatomy? You have ten seconds." "Um... the head." "Good. Eight seconds." "Um... the heart." "That's right. Five seconds." "Oh... um... damn. My husband drilled it into me last night and I had it on the tip of my tongue this morning..." "That's close enough! You've won $100,000!"

Went up to Damerells to have a peak at the new CB1000GT. Very nice too. I was with Steve and Martyn. I think Steve has found his new bike.

You are overestimating @Marcel's mechanical acumen, if he can't fix it with a hammer then he can't fix it.