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My day started with a 2am alarm call and a trip to Bristol airport, we’re off to Croatia for the wife’s birthday why she couldn’t have it in Ponty I don’t know, anyhow I am now sat around the airport waiting for the flight won’t be in touch for a few days as I only have a works phone and forgot to set it up for travel abroad

Enjoy your week at work twats

Me and the wife have found a proper metal club it’s the kind of place where they kill you and let your body go cold before raping you had to wade 200 yards through scrubland to get to it reminds me of a hells angels club house of old. If I disappear tell the pigs the last place I was at was Metal Klub Croatia

Paolo and I have walked around Milan this morning, the girls have gone shopping. I’m hoping for a nice pizza later then an early night as we are flying back tomorrow

Nope they didn’t. Not surprised, they obviously wanted to get away as quickly as possible from their fuckwittery. The motorway runs through the mountains and the drop on the other side of the barriers was cavernous so yer definitely could of been worse and thanks

Same , my mrs birthday we are in sunny Fuerteventura … have a good one .

I’ve just realised how senile I am that was the second time I had my teeth hit out the first time was by some prick on a motorcycle. Me and the Same mate were cycling over to meet some girls in the same area when I spotted the latest model of some Suzuki bike parked up in a back lane can’t even remember what it was now. I stopped and had a good look at it when someone came out of a house and said something to me I don’t know what I finished looking at the bike and moved on . We stopped a little further on for a chat when the bike I was looking at pulled up with the owner and he just went mad accusing me of trying to steal his bike after repeatedly saying I haven’t touched your bike he just punched me in the face while I was still straddling my pushbike then jumped on his bike and fucked off leaving me me with my front teeth missing and wondering what the fuck just happened. Anyway the end result was he ended up in court and I bought my first road bike with the compensation I got and he got a criminal record for ABH and banned from the martial arts club he was very high up in. Another Abercynon fucking prick again

As a young kid I was trying to carve something with a dull knife. I pushed hard, the blade let go and I punched a rock or something. My reaction was to pull my hand back. At which point I stuck the blade in my eyebrow. Stopped the bleeding, cleaned it up, my eyebrow hid the cut so I never told anyone. Scared the crap out of me, I haven't tried to carve anything since. A few mm lower and it would have been lights out - in that eye anyway. Other stuff has happened over the years but that's the one that scared me the most. Probably because it was entirely self inflicted.

Are you crazy, he'll have your eye out with another jumbo top box pic!

Same bloke could drive a nail into a rafter with one blow of his hammer, I was mocked for taking longer (tippy tap tippy tap is more my style). On the other hand I would have to go and get the box of plasters from his car every few days when he hit his own finger.

Filled up a bit now so lots of witnesses got to be honest it’s fucking awesome takes me back to my late teens, what looked like terrorists and murderers when we we first arrived have turned into the nicest people I have met. fucking amazed that everyone speaks great English here

Fucking state on that Gammon!

...and get some sun on those legs fer fucks sake.

I once died as a kid but my mum just told me to walk it off. Kids these days are mollycoddled.

I'm sure you're doing it right. It's just that it won't vibrate like the Harley plugs do so you don't get the full treatment.

So it is basically a country full of queers then.

I've been out Styling and Profiling!

Looking around I’d say their more like crustaceans lol

who isnt?

I had a job labouring for a roofer for a few weeks when I was about 18. Standing on a roof stripped of tiles there was strong gust of wind and I lost my balance and started to fall backwards, a few floors below me was a large green house. He only used ladders, never scaffolding. I had a claw hammer in one hand and I managed to hook the claw over a batten and stop myself. "I nearly fell off then!" I shouted in shaky legged terror. He replied that if I did fall off I could bring up the next batch of tiles.

Possibly the scariest thing ever in my life just happened. As I was stuffing some cardboard into the recycling bin the neighbours cat screamed and flew from the inside right through the narrow slit and flew right past my face. I almost just died from the fright, gave a proper scream too.

They didn’t muck about at my audiology appt and immediately programmed a new hearing aid which was lovely of them. Then on my way out of the dept I bumped the person who first sorted my hearing aids out 13 years ago who gave me a lovely hug and we chatted for yonks about all sorts which was a nice bonus. This means the bluetooth connectivity now works and the trip to the Alps in just over a weeks time won’t be wrecked. Then my new duds turned up and they are all good, so I won’t have to carry normal clothes and hiking gear. They cover all occasions and will easily fit on the panniers. Good day so far

Pete was born ginger, does that count?

My kind of place!

And this is for fun?!

They said fanny packs were gone, I said no way!

I see Paris Hilton still hasn’t got her shades back. Have fun!

There speaks a man with experience.

That looks a nice condition XT!

Every bike here seems to be a scooter of some sort the only bikes I’ve seen is the Xt in the photo and a lots of transalps

Pics?

Always cracks me up.

Is this to help with Harley owner's depression?

Englishman: "That your Dog"..?? Welshman: "Aye". Englishman: "Mind if I Speak to him"..?? Welshman: "Dog don't Talk.” Englishman: Hey Dog, how's it going"..?? Dog: "Doing All Right, Thanks". Welshman: (Look of Shock). Englishman: Is this your Owner"..?? (Pointing at the Welshman). Dog: "Yep." Englishman: How's He Treating You"..?? Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the park once a week to play." Welshman: (Look of Total Disbelief). Englishman: "Mind if I Talk to your Horse"..?? Welshman: "Horse Don't Talk”. Englishman: "Hey Horse how's it Going"..?? Horse: "Cool, Thanks". Welshman: (Extreme Look of Shock). Englishman: "Is this your Owner"..?? (Pointing to the Welshman). Horse: "Yep." Englishman: "How's He Treating You"..?? Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking, he Rides me, Brushes me down often and keeps me in a nice Stable to protect me from the Weather." Welshman: (Now a Look of Total Amazement). Englishman: "Mind if I Talk to your Sheep"..?? * Welshman: "That Sheep's a bloody Liar”..

Must have been a hot day of riding ...

With the stupid stuff I've done on the bike i could fill this page for days, not bike related there's one thing i done when i was probably around 9 or 10 year old that i still think about today. At that age i loved climbing things anything that was a challenge and i'd have a go, there was an old deserted quarry near my home which i would climb regular, it was probably about 100ft high, one day i was climbing a part i hadn't climbed before i was getting close to the top when i grabbed hold of the rockface to pull myself up and what i grabbed hold of came away in my hand and i was frozen there teetering on the balance point of falling backwards or towards the rockface for what seemed like forever, at the time it got the adrenalin flowing and not much else and i was climbing up the same line straight after, It was only when i got older i realised how close i came, i was on my own where i'd seen nobody else go there in all the times i'd been there and nobody knew i was there, if i had gone the wrong way the search would have been for a body not a missing child

Excellent, 10 years old so you knew better, a solid 7 out of 10 You don’t say Pedro, genius Somehow I already knew there wouldn’t be any kindness or sympathy in your words, don’t like to miss an opportunity do you!

You had to be there Pedro, I was booted out to the right on impact and heading fast towards to the barriers, breaking was definitely the right choice.

Thanks I was breaking hard before impact and felt like I almost had back control (but I didn’t) so apart from a smashed wing mirror, some scuffing on the engine bars the bike looks remarkably good. Getting the bars out of the barriers was the hardest part! Mind you I’ve not looked at it closely.

It’s surprising you have lived so long given how many deep state organisations are trying to kill you.

Not good Clive, me and my mate were walking over to meet some girls when we were about 16 when we had to walk past a group of lads walking towards us after we past them they turned around and jumped us took us by surprise. One of them punched me when i turned to see who grabbed me so that was my two front teeth gone, my mate was a bit tasty and had a pair of steel toecap docs on which he put to good use and they ran off. Had to have a tooth either side of the two they hit out removed after so like you Clive 4 missing. I had the good fortune to bump into one of the lads a year or so later he wasn't so hard on his own. he wasn't the one who hit my teeth out but i made sure he knew how i felt about it fucking gutless pricks all of them.

57, had to work it out on a calculator though.

71 in 6 months

Wow, you’re on for a sixty-niner at the end of the month

No choice , part of his licence ..Less schools up there .