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Showing content with the highest reputation on 19/10/26 in all areas

  1. A man went to a urologist and told him that he was having a problem and that he was unable to get his Penis erect. After a complete exam the Doctor told the man that the muscles around the base of his penis were damaged from a prior viral infection and there was nothing he could do for him. However, he knew of an experimental treatment that might work, if he were willing to take the risk. The treatment consisted of implanting muscle tissue from an elephant's trunk in the man's penis. The man thought about it for a while. The thought of going through life without ever experiencing sex again was just too much for him to bear. So, with the assurance that there would be no cruelty or adverse effect on the elephant, the man decided to go for it. A few weeks after the operation, he was given the green light to use his newly renovated equipment. As a result, he planned a romantic evening with his girlfriend and took her to one of the nicest restaurants in the city. However, in the middle of dinner he felt a stirring between his legs that continued to the point of being extremely painful. To release the pressure, he unzipped his fly and immediately his penis sprang from his pants, went to the top of the table, grabbed a roll, then returned to his pants. His girlfriend was stunned at first, but then with a sly smile on her face said: "That was incredible. Can you do that again?" With his eyes watering, he replied: "I think I can, but I'm not sure if I can fit another Roll up my Arse."
    4 points
  2. I got one online from a carb specialist over here. NRP if I remember right. Haven't got all the panels back on the bike but it's running again without petrol pouring out, yet.
    1 point
  3. Only certain professionals can get away saying these... Doctor : Please take off your clothes Dentist : Now open wide and hold still Veterinarian : How's your pretty pussy Gardener : Want me to fertilize your bush Lawyer : Let's go over section 69 Banker : If you withdraw too early you lose interest Chef : Do you like it hot and spicy Police : You don't need protection Army personnel : Load... Aim... Fire...! Swimming instructor : Go deeper Gym trainer : Push harder Interior Decorator: Once its done, you will love it Telephone Guy : Would you like it on the table or against the wall
    1 point
  4. Long story short....anyway from all of the ear scratching, her left eye got a real bad infection , had to wash it out almost every second day or the eye would shut completely with mucous...was using what I could find at the drug store , polisporine eye drops and ointment for the ear... It was around 11 am when the vet called her in to have a look..figure in my mind that was it...and she would recommend me to put her to sleep...she checked her heart and she could tell the dog was in pain...the Vet said look I have 3 surgery today, one of those I can wait for tomorrow...and I can remove what's in her ear but no guarantees...the dog is 13 years old...told her to go ahead and if the dog dies well ... It turned out to be polyps one large one and another smaller one further down the ear canal...she made it through like a champ and already almost back to normal today...that a pic from when I brought her back home..she was still a little bang up by the Anastasia..
    1 point
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