Saul

Did it offend you Wokey.

He was there when I started my shift. We share the office with the District Nurses so I think he is on there team.

My seat of misery with the oldest slowest PC in the world. At least I have my little mate to talk to.

Oh the side panel. Have you been to the optician recently

I hope not I am waiting for some stuff from Amazon.

Oh all right, I thought it would be a good game An Banner Kernewek (A small Cornish flag).

I was out cleaning my bike this afternoon and I heard someone say "I like your bike". I looked up and it was an Amazon delivery guy, who looked to be of South Asian heritage. I said I was pleased with it, to which he smiled and said "Made in a good country".

It's only a little thing Matron.

Sorry none of them

I take your point here is a before shot.

Nope that has been on for a week or more.

To use Henry Cole parlance I have been shining my sled. So bike clean, can you spot the new addition?

It was it seemed like half the street went down laughing at the performance. Another time I stayed there Saturday overnight with a friend, I decided to run off my hangover in the morning, still in my rugby days so I could actually run then. Whilst going down towards the ferry slip I saw a chap looking very bleary eyed coming out the back of some council flats doing the walk of shame. What I thought was quite unusual was the chap was still in full Saltash rugby kit covered in mud from the day before carrying his boots. Saltash is a fair way from Torpoint and I bet he had had an interesting Saturday night. I would have loved to know the story but did not think it was a good time to ask.

It's bloody Cornwall mate you have you pay to breathe let alone park.

When you do tell her Torpoint is the asshole of Cornwall I dread us going to a call there at work. I did work there at Thancks Tanks, Naval Avgas storage facility years ago. Not a pleasant place. I made the mistake of going out there one New Years, saw some fantastic new years fighting in the street. One that comes to mind was one drunken serviceman trying to headbut another whilst wearing a Giraffe costume. Hard to explain but the guys head was halfway down the neck of the costume so when he tried to drop the nut the stuffed head about 18 inches above his real one swung in a massive arc. You had to be there really but trust me it was very funny.

When you live on our narrow little peninsula it is quite possible to have 4 seasons in one day. Tis clearing now but still blowing up rough

Horizontal rain and blowing bell tink.

You would never believe it was like this just 4 days ago, its like fecking Mordor out there now.

When I am tested next year I will have to remind myself, "What would Buckster do".

I wish that were an option but as always in life it's complicated. The girl in question circulated photoshopped nude photos with my daughters face on them. Police have dealt with it. This vile child was not in my daughters school at the time (6 months ago) although she knew her, but is starting there this week, after being expelled from most schools in the area. That's why my daughter lost it. There is more to it but for my daughter's sake it is best not to share to much. To be fair my daughters school didn't know but does now. I am not happy for my daughter to go to another school, this is rural Cornwall and schools are spread out. Next two nearest options are 7 miles away and not somewhere I would be happy for her to go. We can see her current school from the window. So our best option is to get things sorted there.

Test was a mix of town, country and Dual carriageway driving.

No I don't think they can fail you. I know one of our drivers has been removed from driving for driving like a tit repeatedly. Trackers on the cars do tell all.

Finished my night shift and got home yesterday to be greeted by my 18 year old son telling me my youngest has gone out, Mrs was at work. Normally not an issue as she is 15 and trustworthy. The problem is that she has been quite horribly bullied at school, and I decided to keep her home until we have had a formal minuted interview with the school. She initially said she never wanted to go there again but over the weekend she has changed her mind said she did want to go in. I said no on text when she asked yesterday morning and that we will stick to what we had put in place. Anyway her response was to run away before I got home from work, after an hour or so I alerted the Police and hit the socials as she made herself uncontactable. Fast forward to 5 pm when she was found after walking 7 miles along the cliff path to another local village. She kicking off and refusing to come home, I rushed there and talked her down and now she is home. Twas a stressful day. Until two weeks ago she was happy with life but thanks to some vile child and the extremes of teenage hormones things are very different. I am hopefully on top of it and we are off to see the Docs later. I know there is lots I haven't said but I just wanted to say that the local Police were fantastic as was the response of my local community. We are very lucky,

Just an update, I passed with flying colours, and the sneeky fooker put me in the DSG car. Apparently we are moving to Kodiaks in the new year and they are all going to be DSG,s don't mind really I quite like an auto.