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The prostitutes tax return A woman walks into an accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her tax returns. The accountant says, "Well, before we begin, I'll need to ask you a few questions." He gets her name, address etc and then asks,"What's your occupation?" "I'm a prostitute," she says. The accountant is somewhat taken aback and says, "Let's try to re phrase that." The woman says, "OK, I'm a high-end call girl". "No, that still won't work. Try again." They both think for a minute; then the woman says, "I'm an elite poultry farmer." The accountant asks, "Excuse my ignorance but what does poultry farming have to do with being a prostitute?" "Well, believe it or not, I must have raised a thousand cocks last year." "Poultry Farmer it is then !!

Probably tastes the same.

41f here this morning....definitely getting a spin on the Mullet today. Got the suspicious feeling this weather is gonna flick like a switch to full-blown Winter weather soon...

That looks like something I find in my Cats litter tray every morning

Complete poofery eh?

Quite a nice mild morning here, was raining earlier, was tempted to try for a short ride , but was informed that we had to go to Asda

Of course he is German. Clever lad though.

Check this out.....id give you the top secret old family recepie but id have to kill you...

Been out obsessively cleaning in the good weather. CBF600 Me CB125F Shadow NX125B How High SYM 125 Fuck Nut Been having a fun time, I do like shiny

That’s a pie ... When you go to a restaurant and order food, I bet it’s always a surprise when it arrives at the table.

Gonna try my hands into making something very difficult to today...brown sugar fudge with peanuts....not to be attempted by amatures...

Well I've got one for you...what would you call this ? ...my mom makes this dish , its a beef stew , potatoes, carrots, turnips , after its all cooked, she makes a two layer dough , one at the bottom and one top , then cooks everything again in the oven ...would this be a casserole ?

Who is this Marcel fellow you guys keep referring to ?

Blokes getting epidurals and buying scooters?

I had my acl reconstruction under epidural

It won’t be long.

Well, now you have to wait until the next flounce, now there’s precedent

You can’t nominate yourself, if you do then @Six30 bums you.

I asked you lot and you all said to let him back in.

I can ban him for good.

Considering this, and when you think of a twat pain in the ass in this forum you think of Marcel. Nobody tries as hard as him to be nominated. So, my nomination is for @Buckster, the guy who allowed Marcel back after he flounced and left the first time.

My wife had her knees done under a epidural anesthetic, she was chatting to the anesthetist the whole time while the procedure was being done, all she could see was this leg and foot being put in some funny positions, knowing it was hers made it quite comical, and not feeling a thing made it even more surreal, she was out of hospital after 2 days, walking with crutches, and stopped using them after 4 weeks..... all the best to your lady @YamaHead