Jokes, your best your worse and all the rubbish on the internet between

[Renegade]

[boboneleg]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[KAYZ1]

On 25/08/2026 at 10:06, boboneleg said:

two sets of door hinges on that right hand door, how the heck do they get in..

[Renegade]

Two couples were playing poker one evening. Jim accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed Les's wife, Sue, wasn't wearing any underwear under her dress! Shocked by this, Jim upon trying to sit back up again, hit his head on the table and emerged red-faced.

Later, Jim went to the kitchen to get some refreshments. Les's wife followed and asked, 'Did you see anything that you like under there?' Surprised by her boldness, Jim admitted that, well indeed he did.

She said, 'Well, you can have it but it will cost you £200.'

After taking a minute or two to assess the financial and moral costs of this offer, Jim confirms that he is interested.

Sue told him that since her husband Les played golf Friday afternoons and Jim didn't, Jim should be at her house around 2pm next Friday afternoon.

When Friday rolled around, Jim showed up at Les's house at 2pm sharp and after paying Sue the agreed sum of £200, they went to the bedroom, and closed their transaction, as agreed.

Jim quickly dressed and left.

As usual, Les came home from golf at 6pm and upon arriving, asked his wife, 'Did Jim come by the house this afternoon?'

With a lump in her throat Sue answered 'Why yes, he did stop by for a few minutes this afternoon.' Her heart nearly skipped a beat when her husband further enquired, 'and did he give you £200?'

Sue, using her best poker face, replied, 'Well, yes, in fact he did give me £200.

Les, with a satisfied look on his face, surprised his wife by saying, 'He came by the golf club this morning and borrowed £200 from me. He promised he'd stop by our house this afternoon on his way home and pay me back.'

Now THAT, my friends, is a poker player

[Catteeclan]

9 hours ago, KAYZ1 said:

two sets of door hinges on that right hand door, how the heck do they get in..

I thought that was the joke

[Renegade]

[KAYZ1]

7 hours ago, Catteeclan said:

I thought that was the joke

I thought it was the good wheel and the knackered wheel..

[YamaHead]

Dolly's custom casket....

[Saul]

[Catteeclan]

Made me chuckle

 

https://www.facebook.com/reel/1073908405434608

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt" Now you can handle the situation.

Jack was the only son of Awe Schitt and Owe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertiliser magnate, married Owe Schitt, the proprietor of Kneedeep N. Schitt Inc.

In turn Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple had six children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt and the twins Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt.

Against her parents will, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school drop-out. After being married for 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Mr. Sherlock and, because her children were still living with them she kept her previous name. She was then known as NoeSchitt-Sherlock.

Dip Schitt married Loada Schitt and they produced a nervous son, Chicken Schitt.

Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable throughout their childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The local newspapers duly announced the Schitt-Happens weddings. The Schitt-Happens children were named Dawg, Byrd and Hoarse.

Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new wife, Pisa Schitt.

So now when someone says,"You don't know Jack Schitt", you can correct them because you know his whole family and life story!

[Renegade]

Jane always had a certain attraction to Tarzan. So during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had sex.

“Tarzan not know what is sex” he replied.

Jane then explained to him what sex was.

Tarzan said ….“Tarzan use knot hole in trunk of tree.”

Stunned by his response, Jane said: “Tarzan you have it all wrong, you don’t shag a tree to get yourself off. Tell you what, I will show you how to do it properly.”

She took off her clothing and laid down on the ground.

“Here” she said, pointing to her privates,“you must put it in here.”

Tarzan removed his loin cloth, showing Jane his considerable manhood, stepped closer to her and kicked her as hard as he could in the crotch.

Jane rolled around in agony for what seemed like an eternity.

Eventually she managed to grasp for air and screamed: “What the bloody hell did you do that for?

“Check for squirrel.” he responds