Skippy

Oh he’s got rolls and rolls of the stuff, same with the kitchen rolls, as I found out when I put the shopping away for him. I could’ve screamed but held it in and cleaned his kitchen bin out after he used it without a bin bag……….I’m not squeamish but I had a little retch to myself.

Exact-fucking-ly………my missus is fuming! The cost of the flights, car hire and hotel (couldn’t kip at mates place like normal) has cost nearly 900 euros. I won’t be doing it again.

Not quite…….spent all day running around like a headless chicken for my old man. Spent an hour and a half in the supermarket for him decide he needed 8 toilet rolls, 4 kitchen rolls, a bottle of red wine (had to be from California ), two pairs of rubber gloves, a bottle of bleach and 2 things you hang on the rim of the toilet to stop it stinking………oh and a packet of chocolate digestives. No wonder I need a few beers.

This just about sums up my day.

………..and that’s why you and me fit right in Pete. I honestly don’t give a fuck about most things and it keeps me sane.

In the UK sorting out admin for my dad. It’s cold, grey and definitely miserable………and that’s not only the weather. On the plus side the pub breakfast was the bollocks!

Ha ha you daft twat……….my old man’s a dustman etc etc etc

Excellent! I’ll give you a shout as soon as I get back and we can organise it. Back on 27th Feb so after that mate.

Seems to be a bit better thanks. Still got a hacking cough but temperature is normal and I don’t need to lie on the sofa all day feeling sorry for myself. It’s a scientific fact that man-flu is real and totally debilitating. Women just get the ordinary version which frankly is no more than mildly inconvenient. Are you on the mend Pete? I’m back to the UK on Monday for a week to see my old man and try and sort out some admin for him. If you’re feeling better in a couple of weeks time I’ll take a ride up and we can catch up over a coffee and slag off everybody on here just like last time.

I made my wife very, very angry. Surprisingly there are no photos of that.

I don’t quite know what to say Pete, I’ve come over all emotional.

Portugal is a long way to go for a haircut mate. Just saying.

Well that’s cheered me up

I’m not taking the piss anymore because I feel like shite today. Sore throat, glands are swelling…………..woooohooooooo, this is going to be fun.

Best laid plans and all that………needed our two bathrooms updating and the plumber we use had an unexpected cancellation so he brought our work forward. That scuppered any trips out, then I was rough for a few days (dodgy takeaway) and now I’ve got loads of problems with my dad in the UK that I’m trying to sort out. Going to have to make a visit in the next week or so because you just can’t speak to anyone in social services or his fucking doctor. Now I’m just tired with it all and have no enthusiasm to go out……..oh, and it’s raining.

I’m still having regular therapy.

That sounds familiar Bob, there was a nice old Honda 125 trail bike that came into my mate’s place a while back with the same plastic gear (badly worn).

Actually I’ve voted for Marcel. His complete lack of effort and total disregard for anything remotely artistic has struck a cord with me. Either that or I just feel like being a cockney cnut.

Cnuts. I’m voting for myself. Nothing better than pleasuring yourself…….sorry, did I just say that out aloud?

Fer fucks sake, I’m only going to have a look at one…….that’s if they’ve got one to look at!

That’s true that is.

From today’s bimble over towards Velez Rubio……..didn’t bother @XTreme because he’s still got the lurgy. Anyway, this is my submission

My first one was just the same as that. If ever there was a bike I should’ve kept!

Funny that because I get cramp in my groin………only when I’m riding (my bike)

Done some internet searching and according to several academic publications and learned journals there’s a good reason for it. Here’s why racers do it; “Dangling your leg into this high-speed airstream results in a significant force on the rider's leg as it acts like a small parachute, creating a turning moment by pulling the riders leg around his core. This in turn encourages a pull on the outside handlebar, further helping to turn the bike through counter-steering” …….and here’s why non-racers do it; “They are cunts” ……so it must be true