Slowlycatchymonkey

Never say never. Having visited a hell of a lot of them district nursing it totally changed my view. There are horrible ones that smell of cabbage and disinfectant and the occupants are dribblers but there are some amazing ones like a hotel where the staff will literally do anything for you, drive you about, provide entertainment, cook your meals, do the dull housekeeping tasks, broke your wrist? No problem Jeeves will even wipe your arse for you. You can join in or you can keep to yourself in your suite. Personally if I become infirm I can't think of a more pleasant place to be doddery. They suffer from a bad wrap and people view them with fear because they think they'll lose their autonomy, they see it as a failure, the reality is far different. It is however a move thats best researched and made before you have to. Someone who has a fractured neck of femur and is discharged straight to a care home they didn't choose will not be happy. Best to get ahead of it and pick out what you want and before you need it and hope you never do!

Its easy to tell if it is cos they'll be a room with your name on it!

Maybe but Im a conscientious shutter of apps, tis bad for the battery leavin all that shite open doncha know. I suppose if you initially select allow access “only while accessing app” that must be true?

Its pretty thick. Any damage to the hand guard?

Excellent my favourite part is the chortling noise at the end

Im running whatever number the most recent update is and no annoyingly I cant find out what app it is. My rubbish Friday afternoon phone went back to the apple store today, they wiped all the content n said if connectivity issues persist then its new phone time so if I have to go back I’ll ask them about it

Ill mostly be muttering complaints that Im in this- and not this - still its only for a week so I can live with it

Im sure thats her, one classy broad!

Woke up early (5am) a couple of days ago, went to pick up my ipad and saw an orange dot at the top of the screen which disappeared as soon as I picked the device up. Looked up what it is. Blow me down its part of the latest iOS update, an orange dot lets you know an app is accessing your microphone. A green dot means an app is accessing your camera and microphone. How creepy is that, an app is accessing my phones microphone while Im asleep, or would normally be and stopped accessing it when I picked up the device?!! Im told as soon as you accept location services you accept google accessing your microphone and camera. Any which way I dont like it!

Is that her face on a t-shirt smoking a fag?

We kept a short notice list for people who could get to the hospital within an hour. If you can do that it’d be worth mentioning because most people are no shows or cancel appointments at the very last minute on the day Makes it very difficult to use the appt for someone else. The short notice patients are like gold dust - no wasting of resources and operation dates etc.

They committed to doing something on a certain date and felt obliged to stick to it. And they’re British, highly skilled in ignoring rain. Lost count of how many optimistic bbqs have gone ahead in the rain cos its “just a shower” or “only a bit of drizzle” and everyone pretends they’re not getting wet and cold

The results everyones been waiting for with baited breath are in… and the shit was gone

For the discerning gambler to ascertain honest odds heres the damage

A new low in work avoidance for me, a cat shit poll Roll up, roll up all you compulsive gamblers out there place your bets….

So damn cool!

I’ve never tried scabbard, not sure I want to now!

A typo, it’s his annual badges parade

People who follow culinary rules are daft. They restrict creative cooking and none of the brilliant fusion dishes would exist if everyone slavishly followed rules. If it taste good eat it. Then again if youre going to start putting the cream on the scone before the jam then youre a proper weirdo. Your address will be forwarded to the popo. Good job Aaaaaargh, what is wrong with you?

Mr Slowlys laptop bag was stolen 4 days ago and the ‘find my’ locations services had its last location in a vast scrubland of 3 metre high sharp pampas grass. He and the police searched for it until all hope was lost. This morning I woke up with a strong feeling Id find it. I persuaded Mr Slowly to take me there and I found it in the first bit of grass I went into. This is the size of the scrubland it was in. Mental ay. I shall be checking any seats that are pulled out for me arent ducking chairs edit: it was only the ipad I found the laptop and bag are a gonna. Heyho, it was the ipad that upset him most.