Renegade

A widow and widower lived next door to each other. They had been neighbours for over 30 years, but each had lost their spouse not too long ago. Over a number of weeks, they had become close. One day, the man asked the woman if she enjoyed fishing. Yes, she replied, she used to enjoy fishing with her late husband. The man agreed to pick her up at 6 a.m. the next morning. They went down to the river at the time they decided the next day, and began fishing. After a while, the man began to move the boat upstream. They came to a fork in the river and the man asked the woman, "Up or down." Being nice, he wanted to let her decide. The woman looked around, promptly took off all her clothes and jumped on the old man. They had passionate sex. After a while, they redressed and resumed fishing. Later in the day, they came to another fork in the river. Again, the man asked, "Up or down," and once again the woman stripped and another round of passionate sex commenced. That evening, upon arriving home, the man asked the woman if she would like to go fishing again the next day. The woman agreed. A little after 6 a.m. the next morning, they got to the river. As they came across that first fork in the river, the hopeful man asked the lady, "Up or down." "Down," the woman replied. A little surprised, the man headed that way. After a morning of fishing, they got to another fork. "Up or down," the man asked. "Up," the woman said. "Wait a minute," the man said. "Yesterday, when I asked that question, you took all your clothes off and we had passionate sex. What's going on?" "Well," the woman replied, "yesterday, I forgot my hearing aid and I thought you said "fuck or Drown!'"

Jacko is feeling terrible and goes to the doctor. ‘‘Sorry,’’ says the doctor, ‘‘I have some bad news. You have Yellow 24, a really nasty virus. It’s called Yellow 24 because it turns your blood yellow and you usually only have 24 hours to live. There’s no known cure so go home and enjoy your final precious moments on Earth ...’’ So Jacko trudges home to his wife and breaks the news. Distraught, she asks him to go to the local working mens Club as he’s never been there with her before. They arrive at the bingo and with his first card he gets four corners and wins £35. Then, with the same card, he gets a line and wins £320. Then he gets the full house and wins £5,000. Then the national game comes up and he wins that too, getting £780,000. ‘‘Son,’’ says the bingo caller, ‘‘I’ve been here 20 years and I’ve never seen anyone win four corners, a line, the full house and the national game on the same card. You must be the luckiest person on Earth!’’ ‘‘Lucky?’’ Jacko screams. ‘‘Lucky? I’ll have you know I’ve got Yellow 24.’’ ‘‘ fuck me’ says the bingo caller. You’ve won the meat raffle as well

Username yaci6246 Password 833534 Link & login to watch Dells funeral Friday 3pm. If you miss the live stream it will be available from the following Tuesday for up to 28 days after .

I have a live link for Dells funeral if anyone wants it. This is the link to the website I will put the username and password here on Tuesday night https://watch.obitus.com/

For Buckster

You will see it

Jack and his date, Blossom were parked on a back road some distance from Newcastle, doing what boys and girls do on back roads some distance from Newcastle: Things were getting hot and heavy when Blossom stopped Jack. "I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a hooker and I charge £120 for sex." She said. Jack just looked at her for a couple of seconds, but then reluctantly paid her and they went on to have mind blowing sex for the next hour. After they were done and had smoked a cigarette, Jack just sat in the driver's seat looking out the window. "Why aren't we going anywhere?" Asked Blossom "Well." Jack replied with a grin on his face. "I should have mentioned this before, but I'm actually a Taxi Driver and the fare back to Newcastle is £130."