Jokes, your best your worse and all the rubbish on the internet between

[YamaHead]

Couldn't be more fitting!....

[Renegade]

A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards .

The little boy asked why he wore his collar backwards .

The man, who was a priest, said, " I am a Father . ."

The little boy replied, "My Daddy doesn't wear his collar like that."

The priest looked up from his book and answered, "I am the Father of many .

The boy said, "My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn't wear his collar that way!"

The priest, getting impatient, said . "I am the Father of hundreds", and went back to reading his book.

The little boy sat quietly thinking for a while, then leaned over and said, "Maybe you should wear a condom, and put your pants on backwards instead of your collar."

[Marcel]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[Buckster]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[Buckster]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye....It reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS

HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION

10 MILES

He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without a second thought...

Soon he sees another sign which reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS

HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION

5 MILES

Suddenly he begins to realize that these signs are for real and drives past a third sign saying:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS

HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION

NEXT RIGHT

His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive. On the far side of the parking lot is a stone building with a small sign next to the door reading:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS

He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks, 'What may we do for you my son?'

He answers, 'I saw your signs along the highway and was interested in possibly doing business.... .'

'Very well my son. Please follow me.' He is led through many winding passages and is soon quite disoriented. The nun stops at a closed door and tells the man, 'Please knock on this door.'

He does so and another nun in a long habit, holding a tin cup answers the door... This nun instructs, 'Please place $100 in the cup then go through the large wooden door at the end of the hallway.'

He puts $100 in the cup, eagerly trots down the hall and slips through the door pulling it shut behind him.

The door locks, and he finds himself back in the parking lot facing another sign:

GO IN PEACE.

YOU HAVE JUST BEEN SCREWED BY THE SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS.

SERVES YOU RIGHT, YOU SINNER.

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[Renegade]

[YamaHead]

[Renegade]

At the end of the tax year, the IRS office sent an inspector to audit the books of a local hospital.

While the IRS agent was checking the books, he turned to the CFO of the hospital and said,

“I notice you buy a lot of bandages. What do you do with the end of the roll when there’s too little left to be of any use?”

“Good question ,” noted the CFO. “We save them up and send them back to the bandage company and every once in a while, they send us a free roll.”

“Oh,” replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went, in his obnoxious way. “What about all these plaster purchases? What do you do with what’s left over after setting a cast on a patient?”

“Ah, yes,” replied the CFO, realizing that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. “We save it and send it back to the manufacturer and every so often they will send us a free bag of plaster.”

“I see,” replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all CFO.

“Well,” he went on, “What do you do with all the remains from the circumcision surgeries?”

“Here, too, we do not waste,” answered the CFO. “What we do is save all the little foreskins and send them to the IRS office, and about once a year they send us a complete prick.”

[Marcel]