yen_powell

Face like a bag of spanners. I wouldn't like to pay for their breakfast (about a large person) Go and throw a few fucks into them (telling someone off) Blood and guts (the red and cream colour of a particular company's railway carriages) Up and down like a whore's drawers (about uneven paving) No two pounds of him hanging straight (an ungainly chap)

My son has an official work document that is many many pages long and consists of nothing but Iranian insults. Most have to do with sex or people's mothers. At the top it asks for people to update the document if they hear any new ones.

"Come on, shit or get off the pot", when you are taking too long to do something.

Well I put that into google and I am none the wiser! Wanted, wanted, potatoes with eels

It's easy, you don't need a licence, training or any sort of certificate. You have more trouble trying to adopt a dog from Battersea Dogs' Home than knocking out a sprog.

My son used to say, 'Dad, I can't sleep'. I would reply, 'If you can't sleep then you don't have to', then as his face lit up, ' BUT you have to lay there with your eyes closed all night'.

'What's for dinner Mum?' 'Shit and sugar Sandwich.' 'Why Dad?' 'Cos 'y's a crooked letter.'

My best was £60/£80 a year for my Africa Twins, then the Varadero. That was for third party fire and theft, 20k miles a year, commuting, ride other bikes 3rd party only and business use (for my job, not delivering pizzas etc) But when I bought a new Versys it went back up to the £250 mark until I lowered the value by using it a lot when I got it back down to the £100 mark. Another new bike has put it back to that range again. I swap back and forth between fully comprehensive and TPFT depending which is cheaper. I believe I have 38 years no claims bonus at the moment, but no company has allowed more than 9 years and when I started riding the most you could have was 3 years with the companies I was insured with. It's the road tax that hurts now, nearly a hundred quid a year for something that doesn't wear the road out or cause congestion!

Neighbour is back home, or at least someone is moving about in there and their car was outside earlier, thin walls here. Also I'll have you know that she knocked on my door on Christmas Eve and gave me a box of chocolates for being a nice neighbour, which does make me a bit embarrassed about not knowing their names when the police asked yesterday. I wasn't ill after eating the chocs so it wasn't an attempt at getting new neighbours.

I hope your birth certificate is in order. You're not still down on it as a girl are you??

Remember Pete, don't be doing all that perfect Spanishy type talking then falling for the parting comment 'Have a safe trip' and answering 'Thank You' in English like in The Great Escape.

I've had to buy some Tourances, used them a lot on the AT so was a fan of them for a long time. Went over to Avon Storm3D on the Versys, they lasted forever and were good in the wet too and it was only £150 for a pair. Unfortunately although Avon have the size on their website, I couldn't find any places selling the 19 inch diameter front for the 1200. So the Tourances are now sitting in my spare room waiting for the okay to ride anywhere I want and then I shall do so on new tyres with a round profile.

I love his videos. I have a suspicion he earns a whole lot of money on the side doing Hollywood movie trailer voice overs.

Jesus, that's been beaten with the ugly stick, kicked with the minger boots and flattened by the 'looks only a mother could love' steam roller.

I am truly gobsmacked!

I still think 3D printing is powerful magic. We are living in the science fiction of my youth. Have you ever seen the episode of Red Dwarf where during a disaster an emergency crew member is 3d Printed by the ship's computer and it jams slightly as it comes out of the plotter, over prints in the head area and he has to bend his head right over to look at people all the time?

You forget, I am partially colour blind, the blue doesn't bother me too much. You can buy the file only and get them printed up again if you know someone with a printer and the right colour plastic, I'll see how I get on with them.

Got my Polish 3D printed hand guard extenders. Just pushed them on and they seem to be tight. Did 70-90mph home on the motorway and they didn't move, stopped the cold wind shooting up my sleeve. I only fitted the right one to come home as a test of the difference they make. Might run a bit of glue or silicon on them to make sure they don't leave me. No tax requested, just came through the post.

It's those James Bond style hand brake turns!

Went out for a brief ride to make sure all was well and that my side stand was not going to fall off. The bash plate reverberates a bit so I stopped once to make sure all the bolts were tight in case I'd missed one, but no, looks like that is just what it does.

You must have hated that episode of Some Mother's Do 'Ave Em where Frank says he wet his knickers at Paddington Station and when probed reveals that he wore dresses till he was 5 because a Gipsy woman told his mother she was going to have a girl so she bought all the clothes and they wouldn't take them back at the shop.

It's on, only had a single washer left over as well!!!! Lost two sockets somehow. The good thing about having my sockets and ratchets in order on those plastic things is that I know when something is missing and what it was. One was a hex/allen socket which had I found had stayed in the side stand monster bolts that I had trouble undoing at the very start of this thread. One down two to go. The other was a 6 sided 14mm socket. I knew it had dropped off of one of the bolts as I was working round the skid plate tightening fasteners and it was easier to get a 12 sided 14mm and carry on and I thought I would look for it afterwards. I hadn't seen exactly where it went to but it hadn't sounded like it went far or even on the floor if you know what I mean. I did about 5 circuits of the bench with a torch, even rechecked all my magnetic dishes in case it had stuck underneath. Finally it occurred to me that I hadn't looked inside the new bash plate.....that's where it was. Long screwdriver pokey time to get it within reach.

My brother volunteered as a marshal at the vaccination centre near Ipswich. All the marshals got a vaccination one evening because they had stuff left over that would have to be destroyed otherwise. maybe being nice does occasionally have benefits.

My replacement bolt was waiting for me when I got home from work yesterday. I also had my second half of a pallet strapped to the back of my bike. The two half pallets together make it a doddle to ride the bike straight on to my ramp without worrying about falling over sideways if my feet miss the edge. I can still push it up if I ever had a dead engine bike to work on, but that can take a few attempts and was always a bit worrying as you nearly made it fully on only to have to cope with it going back down the ramp before trying again. They also made putting it on the centre stand much easier. So bike is ready at a comfy height, I have my replacement bolt, it'll be tea and music time later on today then a ride about to make sure nothing is going to drop off!