Renegade

1 year today you left us Pete. R.I.P you are greatly missed mate.

ND --- North Dakota ?

Do you know ******** IF My Best Mate came up to me and said IF I HAD SEX WITH YOUR WIFE would it make us Relation's I said NO but i thought it would MAKE US EVEN LOL

Congratulations to you both. It's my 48th anniversary next week on the 20th May.

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband is not in bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee. 'What's the matter, dear' she whispers as she steps into the room, 'Why are you down here at this time of night The husband looks up from his coffee, 'It's the 20th Anniversary of the day we met'. She can't believe he has remembered and starts to tear up. The husband continues, 'Do you remember 20 years ago when we started dating, I was 18 and you were only 16,' he says solemnly. Once again, the wife is touched to tears. 'Yes, I do' she replies. The husband pauses The words were not coming easily. 'Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car' 'Yes, I remember' said the wife, lowering herself into the chair beside him. The husband continued. 'Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter or I will send you to prison for 20 years' 'I remember that, too' she replied softly. He wiped another tear from his cheek and said "I would have gotten out today."

OMG take it off ********* A Wife came home early from work with a headache, she was surprised to find her husband home and said BERT can you follow me up stairs which he did, Then she said Bert can you take off my skirt and blouse which he did then she said take off all my underwear which he did, then she said IF I CATCH YOU WEARING THEM AGAIN THERE WILL BE TROUBLE.

Happy heavenly birthday Pete.

Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize. “Please allow me to help. I’m a Physical Therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you’d allow me.” she told him. “Oh, no, I’ll be all right. I’ll be fine in a few minutes,” the man replied. He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands at his groin. At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside. She administered tender and artful massage for several long moments and asked, “How does that feel?” He replied, “It feels great, but I still think my thumb’s broken.