Slowlycatchymonkey

You know the caterings bad when you’re relived to see cheese n pineapple on sticks

Baldrick is me and my bezzie trying to figure out who owes who what whenever we go away Although he might be a notch up.

Ooo will there be champagne and canapés? or is it a cheap warm white wine and mushroom condensed soup vol au vent eaten off a flimsy half sized napkin type celebration?

@boboneleg BOB BOOOOBBBBBBBBB BOB BOB BOBBY BOB BOB BOB BOB BOB BOB BOB BOBBBBBBB BOOOOOOOBOOOOONELLLLEEEEEEG You’re wanted and needed

Quality

What’s early? I need a lie in and haven’t finished trying to reel Bob back in

She sounds like she’s worth working on your stealth skills for!

Background cos oh you'll judge me hard otherwise. My mum does not like looking after other people so after my dads knee op I dropped his keys off to be told she was only staying a few days and then she had things arranged to do elsewhere, how would he get to his appointments, who would look after him? This was repeated on loop trying to make me agree to come back from Spain. Over the years this type manipulation where I end up being treated like a skivvying maid finally left its mark so I just shrugged and when pushed said "I don't know, you'll have to arrange his appointments for when you can be here or perhaps rearrange your appointments because I won't be here" Lead feckin balloon. Lady bountiful only does guest appearances. So I might not have mentioned I'm back, well hardly worth it is it as I'm gone again in a couple of weeks and if she knows she'll do a runner and leave me with all the work as usual. Stopped in the supermarket on the way back from our jabs. I jokingly say if we see my parents we say we came back yesterday for our jabs and are leaving Friday. It was a joke, a tongue in cheek winky face joke playing on the deception. I'm perusing the chocolate isle... Kakaa kakaa. Wha?? KaKAA KAKAAA Mr Slowly has appeared and is making loud bird sound warning signal noises behind me. Your mums here. I laugh a lot. KaKAA KAKAA??!! Very funny. Yer your mums here. I'm still laughing and now he is too. Except it was no joke she was in the supermarket. Mr Slowly put his sunglasses on and his hood up and went to the checkout, I spied a massive stack of baskets being wheeled to the door to use as cover for my escape. Hid behind the car until Mr Slowly arrived. Laughed all the way home. There you go a fully grown woman hiding from their mum. Haven't done that since I was 14 when I bunked off school and she came home from work at lunch time for a cup of tea.

Have you as an adult ever hidden from someone? And worse.. have you ever been caught hiding?

Okiedokie, here goes... Intellect doesn't come into being a good mod. You don't have to understand the content of any conversation to know whether it's turning bad, the signs are universal. Some folk are good at spotting these signs. I won't say they're naturally more empathic or sensitive cos this lot won't understand that so lets land on- Some people are more tuned in. There are different types of intelligence. Emotional intelligence is rare (especially round here ) so when one of those people blessed with that talent and an even temper AND the skill to stay out of it until necessary - well it would be remiss of them not to bring those skills to the table, share them and make everyones life better. How's that? ps @Clive if you dont won't this pile of dogdoo to deal with..

Thats why they always stick people in fancy dress costumes for fight scenes, bet it was bloody hilarious.

Wow Saul I'm so sorry, thats ridiculously stressful. They say you're only as happy as your most unhappy child, I'm pretty sure thats true. Hope it's all resolved soon. Doesn't sound like it'll be long before the vile child will be expelled from your daughters school too. It is still possible to have a 'quiet word' with people. Your situation sounds like its already well into the official channels so maybe best not muddy your own reputation?! My son was being bullied by a child that was violent and had some sort of undiagnosed special needs. The teacher responded by repeatedly telling my son "not to tell mummies or daddies or brothers about Nicholas (the bullies name) because it wasn't fair on Nicholas. We had no idea. My son started to cry whenever I dropped him at school. Then one evening he was in his bunk bed sobbing his heart out but refusing to tell us why because he didn't want to get in trouble. Eventually he cracked and told us. The bully was bad enough but the teacher? WTF, he was 5 years old FFS. Anyway I'm no advocate of intimidation or threatening violence but when someone damages your child and would continue to do so theres no depths I won't go to. All I'll say is watching Mr Slowly skilfully build from a genuinely quiet word to watching her slide down the wall onto the floor in a heap without him laying a finger on her worked a treat. We withdrew him from school until they resolved the problem, they apologised and they got rid of the kid. The mental scars are still on him though even though he was only five at the time.

Ur dandy

I don’t really like this ‘old and new’ members thing that’s being used in a divisive fashion. It’s completely unnecessary and uncomment worthy. Old members get just as hacked off by the unpleasantness as the new ones and have also spoken up. So let’s drop the cliques forming bs shall we and try n be cordial. If you can’t do it for yourself then do it for Pete who has repeatedly stated he’s got enough on his plate. Take it onboard and have some consideration.

I like that. I also like the no mod option just cos I'm wondering if Pete will end up with more work on his plate moderating moderators

Me neither. Contentious issues aside I'm on here in concentrated doses and then have commitments that see me unable to to contribute for blocks of time.

come on now the comedy vote never wins.... boatymcboatface .... Boris.... Oh dear