Buckster

I’m hoping that the seat to peg distance is very short and makes it uncomfortable for long legs, then I won’t need one.

I think, I'm going to lose my drivers license... and all just because of a stupid police officer... The conversation went like this, when I got pulled over in my car: Officer: "Where are you coming from, I think you are drunk!" Me: "I assure you, I did not drink anything." Officer: "Ok, let's do a little test! Imagine driving in the dark on a motorway at night, when you see two lights in the distance. What is this?" Me: "A car." Officer:"Of course! But which one? A Mercedes, an Audi or a Ford?" Me:"I have no idea!" Officer:"So, you're drunk." Me:"But I didn't drink anything." Officer:"Okay, one more test -- Imagine, you drive in the dark on a country road at night, and there is one light coming at you.What is it? Me:"A motorcycle." Officer:"Of course! But which one? A Honda, a Kawasaki or a Harley?" Me:"I have no idea!" Officer:"As I suspected, you're drunk!" Then I started to get annoyed and asked a counter question. Me:"So..., counter question -- You're driving in the dark on a city street at night and see a woman on the roadside. She wears a mini skirt, fishnet stockings, high heeled shoes and only a bra as a top. What is this?" Officer:"A prostitute of course." Me:"Yes, but which one? Your daughter, your wife or your mother?" Things went downhill from there and now I have a court date to attend...

Did someone say “vest”?

It doesn’t matter what it is, it’s a Honda so it’s

Advice for the ladies.

You don't worry about weight when you look at women, why should he worry about it looking at bikes?

Needs bigger bags.

That not what the midgets say.

Go scrape your scabs.

First impressions of the Cobra Chrome are good, it is less susceptible to tracking and I have already started scraping the floorboards.

I think it is the perfect bike for you.

Just think, if you got a Versys you wouldn’t be a mangy ginger homo, you would just be a mangy ginger.

Well I did 470 miles over the weekend, slept two nights under canvas, drank beer and whisky and whiskey, had lunch with a beautiful woman, made some new friends and now I’m home changing the oil on the bike. I’m a fucking legend, you lot need to respect my authority.

You can't talk, you only have one leg.

I built a reputation for being a mother fucker. It has served me in life.

Is China open for business?

It was one of Pete’s nomme de plumes.

Well and truly fofilled.

Pants.

This is actually @Slowlycatchymonkey’s pen name.

Tell your twin not to visit, if he lives locally.