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You obviously stand a better chance than my bike w/ Pedals ....

murphy calls to see his mate paddy, who has a broken leg. paddy says, "Me feet are freezing mate, could you nip upstairs and get me slippers?" "No bother," he says, and he runs upstairs and there are paddy's two stunning 19 year old twin daughters sat on their beds. "Hello dere girls, your Da' sent me up here to shag ya both." "Fook off you liar!" "I'll prove it," murphy says. So he shouts down the stairs, "Both of them, paddy?" "Of course, what's the use of fookin' one?"

I voted for "Everyone Enters 1 photo"........... but I won't, not that any of my photos had any chance of winning, but do you seriously want a photo of a scooter as "Bike" of the year?

OK, 8 votes. That's a surprisingly low number considering the whining last year. The decision has been made then, unless the vote changes dramatically.

Plenty of grumps around here anyway, you do well to not be self conscious and to stay around!

@Marcel, get yourself a highly realistic toy Indian for Christmas.

Just take all the time you need and don't forget we are here ready to abuse you whenever you need.

Thanks guys, don't want to be a grump but it still hurts she was my lover and my best mate. I will buck up soon as she told me i had to..Love to all.

I feel for you pal, it gets easier with time but it never feels the same.

That is understandable Lyn.

And mine, not doing Christmas this year.

That’s typical of you lot, to hell with the grandmother down the hill who’s drowning.

It's ok, my house is at the top of the street

That will be the sea level up a couple of inches.

Got my new mattress, it sprang out of the packaging like a 100lb cobra.

Regardless of our resident Asbo recipient, it is going to be epic.

Missed.

I'm building the excitement.

People voted for the camels, not the wank panzer.

Thanks Saul. Took some doing to win a BOTM this year, had to go all the way to Morocco and pay a guy to walk his camels in front of my bike