Renegade

What type of farm are you on? I come from a dairy farm.

Joe wanted to buy a Harley motorcycle. He doesn't have much luck, until one day, he comes across a Harley with a 'for sale' sign on it. The bike looks better than a new one, although it is 10 years old. It's shiny and in mint condition. He buys it and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years. 'Well, it's quite simple,' says the seller, 'whenever the bike is outside and it's gonna rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome.It protects it from the rain, and he hands Joe a jar of Vaseline. That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her parents. Naturally, they take the bike there. Just before they enter the house, Sandra stops him and says, 'I have to tell you something about my family. 'When we eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the FIRST person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes.' 'No problem,' he says.. And in they go. Joe is shocked.Right in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes. In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks dirty dishes. They sit down to dinner, and sure enough, no one says a word. As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation. He leans over and kisses Sandra. No one says a word. He reaches over and fondles her breasts. Nobody says a word. So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the table and screws her, right there in front of her parents. His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid and her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word. He looks at her mom. She's got a great body too. Joe grabs mom, bends her over the table, pulls down her panties, and screws her every which way but loose right there on the dinner table. She has a big orgasm, & Joe sits down. His girlfriend is furious, her dad is boiling, & Mom is beaming from ear to ear. But still ... . Total silence. All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain. Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket. Suddenly the father shouts. I'll do the fuckin’ dishes

The Madam opened the Brothel Door to see a frail, elderly gentleman. "Can I help you"..?? the Madam asked. "I want Natalie," the Old Man replied. "Sir, Natalie is one of our most Expensive Ladies, perhaps someone else"..??? "NO, I must see Natalie." the old guy exclaims. Just then Natalie appeared and announced to the Old Man, that she Charges £1,000 per visit. Without blinking, the Old Man reached into his Pocket and handed her Ten £100 notes. The two went up to a room for an hour, whereupon the man calmly left. The next night he appeared again demanding to see Natalie..?!?!? Natalie explained that no one had ever come back Two Nights in a Row and that there were NO Discounts. It was still £1,000 a visit. Again the Old Man took out the Money, the Two went up to the room and an hour later, he left. When he showed up the THIRD Consecutive night, no one could believe it. Again he handed Natalie the money and up to the room they went. At the end of the hour Natalie questioned the Old Man:- "No one has ever used my Services Three Nights in a Row. Where are you from Sir"..??? The Old Man replied, "I'm from Cardiff "Really"..?? replied Natalie. "I have Family who Lives there." she replies. "Yes, I Know," said the old man. "Your Father Died recently, and I'm your Sister's Attorney". * "And she asked me to give this £3,000, when I saw you"..

I'd kick hith arth

Yeth I haff

I havn't had a shit since 2025