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Mawsley

NC500 by scooters

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1 minute ago, Buckster said:

Just put music in place of the sound, no one wants the hear that piece of crap anyway.

Yep. But I need to sort out how to do that thing.

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1 minute ago, Mawsley said:

Locked and loaded.

 

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You’re going to die.

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You've got a perfectly good touring bike behind the Vespa :classic_laugh:

 

Enjoy the ride, keep us posted.

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6 hours ago, Pedro said:

You've got a perfectly good touring bike behind the Vespa :classic_laugh:

 

Enjoy the ride, keep us posted.

Exactly. Where’s the challenge in that?

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Day 1 - Wife wakes me so I can shave and wonder why I am ready two hours before I need to be at the meeting spot. Worse, instead of marching bands and fireworks, or saucy oral pleasure, she brought me a coffee that tastes of washing up liquid and tales of rampant cystitis. 
 

There are reasons I’m looking forward to getting away to my first holiday for 11 years.

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Day 1 cont. 

I could now write a book on “Fuel stations of the A1”

It'd be riveting. 
 

 

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Day 1 ends in Dumfries and I learnt some things. Firstly, I learnt that if you buy video cams for the bike then you should give them a sound try before you go away. Both of them went on the piss so I have zero footage of the cunt who tried to kill four of us, resulting in me chasing her across the Pennines to remove pieces of her car.

For the benefit of any police reading this, what I meant to say is that I believe she dropped something important and I was returning said item to her when me and my chums saw pieces of her car fall off.  

Secondly, I’m impressed with the Pennines - attempted murderous cunt notwithstanding. First time across the A66, shame we couldn’t stop off for a pic at a Barnard Castle optometrist. 

Which brings me to the third thing I learnt: 12hrs after I set off for the journey we rolled into Dumfries. Now on any previous trip this would have entailed falling from the machine, aching and managing a pint before collapsing. I felt like I could’ve ridden for another 12 hours. Well, kinda. Maybe another couple. 

Unlike Cumbria, nobody has tried to kill me (yet). The fried breakfast and fried supper probably constitute murder weapons and these days and I could probably sue someone for it. *makes mental note to investigate this

Upon reflection, I guess I could sue the Queen seeing as I dined at her Scottish holiday home - you’d really think they could’ve afforded something a bit more castley, eh?

 

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Few photo ops today too as we attempt to avoid Glasgow & its deep fried drug dealers of death and plough a furrow to Fort William - famous for being the home of the inventor of the Yo-yo, the deepest chocolate mine in Europe and [insert some other made-up facts here because I can’t be arsed to think of any others].

Later tonight I shall sleep with a different man to the stranger I slept with last night. Go scootering! Hopefully that hotel won’t be as stuffy as this one. 

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15 hours ago, Pedro said:

Is that a motorway? :classic_laugh:

You’ll struggle to find a way from the Midlands to Scotland without one - unless you have a helicopter or more than a week away from work. 

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14 hours ago, XTreme said:

I couldn't be seen with that lot!

Are you the AceFace Dave?

 

Are you the arse-face?

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1 hour ago, XTreme said:

Great stuff Dave......you've covered a fair distance already then?

No breakdowns yet?

One, predictably a Lambretta. 
 

But all the wooses who came up in vans start riding today - so plenty to come 😁

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23 minutes ago, Mawsley said:

One, predictably a Lambretta. 
 

But all the wooses who came up in vans start riding today - so plenty to come 😁

So some of them brought their scooters in vans? 

Jimmy Fallon Reaction GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon

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50 minutes ago, XTreme said:

So some of them brought their scooters in vans? 

Jimmy Fallon Reaction GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon

Pretty sure that is the natural habitat of Italian scooters, they should have got some good Chinese scooters.

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I thought the wind was blowing the wrong direction this morning but now I realise the smell of shit is because of all the extra scooterists in Scotland this morning.

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1 minute ago, boboneleg said:

Fuckmine, Imagine how that handles on the road 😵

 

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Does he know he's put it on back to front?

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